The only thing missing is a throbbing Kenny Loggins tune

Rating: 6/10 (25 May 2014)

The suits at Paramount clearly wanted a "Top Gun on wheels" (even going so far as to hire Robert Towne to write the thing), but "Days of Thunder" ended up being a loud, stupid mess; a soulless commercial (not just the Mello Yello product placement) machined with star, director and producing power, but ridiculous in its dramatic narrative. It is awful.
Which is why it is also glorious - naturally, for all the wrong reasons:
1. There's lots of melodramatic screaming in this movie. And squinting.
2. Tom Cruise goes from being a reckless prick to a reckless prick with a trophy. He learns nothing from the events of the film; it's golden.
3. Robert Duvall spends screen time giving an inspirational locker room speech to a stock car.
4. Kidman works her Aussie accent for maximum hotness.
5. Almost makes me care about NASCAR. Almost.
And to top it all off, Cruise is sporting one of the greatest character names in cinema: Cole Trickle. Just say it back to yourself: Cole. Trickle. You can't make that nonsense up. And somebody did!
Gather some like-minded individuals and crack open a few cold ones. You're in for some laughs.
6/10