Like, Even Shaun Of The Dead Was 10x Better Than This

Rating: 3/10 (12 September 2011)

Yep. It's true. This review may contain a "spoiler", or 2.
You know, after watching this less than frightening "Dawn Of The Dead" remake - I seriously think that Director Zack Snyder should return, like, pronto, to directing TV commercials for BMW and Gaterade. He really should. 'Cause if Dawn Of The Dead (DOTD) is really supposed to be a sample of Snyder's work as a feature-film Director, then I think it stinks.
I mean, let's face it, Snyder doesn't have the knack for sustaining horror in his picture, nor does he have the ability for developing interesting characters, or even creating an involving storyline. This is all so clearly evident in this little debut feature film of his.
Believe me, the spine-tingling, rapid-fire images that one sees during the opening credits of DOTD are 10x more terrifying than anything we are shown in the actual picture. In my opinion DOTD only came to life in its final 15 minutes and by that point I was so bored out of my mind by it all. I mean, this movie offered absolutely nothing new to the viewer. And, if that wasn't bad enough, DOTD lapsed, far too often, into a regular, little soap opera of bickering, betrayal, and back-biting amongst the non-zombies.
In my opinion, all the in-fighting amongst the folks at Crossroads Mall got so tedious at times that I seriously began to wonder who the real monsters were here - The dysfunctional humans? - Or - The flesh-devouring zombies? I mean, if there actually was a choice to be made in the matter, all I can say is - At least the zombies knew exactly what they wanted.
And speaking about the zombies here in DOTD, like, what was this breed, anyways? They seemed to be just "biters" not "eaters". Whatever happened to zombies who took the time to actually devour a person alive? 'Cause unless I blinked when it happened, DOTD certainly lacked this very integral part of any zombie's relevant existence.
And, so, in conclusion - I can't begin to tell you how truly disappointed I was with DOTD. Here I was all prepared to have the socks scared right off of me (in the same fashion as 28 Months Later freaked, me out, big time), but it just didn't happen.
This remake certainly made the original 1978 version seem positively sensational by comparison. This film was so bloody dreary at times that even the birth of the zombie baby, as cute as he/she was, seemed somehow trite and altogether anti-climatic in the long run.
Yep. Before it's too late - Let's send Zack Snyder back to directing TV commercials. Pronto!