Note to Rob Zombie: this is how you do an homage.

Rating: 8/10 (13 September 2005)

Zombie to-do list:
1. Eat brains
2. Moan a lot
3. Look messed up
4. MEmnNASmAMmNa UHHhhhuhhh
5. Eat brains
Gone is the subtle, serious horror of Romero's Night of the Living Dead; fortunately, it's been replaced with funny, suspenseful, and action-packed scenes. It plays kind of like a Resident Evil video game, which may or may not be appealing to you. I thought it kicked ass.
This movie jumps right into the action, giving you only about 3 minutes of background and build-up. Anna (played by Canuck Sarah Polley) is a nurse, people start turning into Zombies, and she high-tails it out of her neighborhood. It sounds terse, but it all happens about that fast. She meets up with a few other survivors, and they hide out in the local mall, fighting for survival. Sure, they're stuck in a shopping mall, hiding from hordes of vicious zombies, but think of all the great stuff they can get at Sears!
The oddest thing about this movie is, after we left, I actually had a discussion with my girlfriend about whether or not I would "kill" her if she turned into a zombie. Yes, an actual conversation. I couldn't convince her that the only things on a zombie's mind are "Eat brains" and "MEmnNASmAMmNa UHHhhhuhhh"; she was upset that I would do my duty to humanity and destroy the undead version of her.
I think a milestone in any relationship is when you can come to terms with the fact that your partner would eradicate your living corpse - I think I stole that from a Hallmark card.