Mindless and wonderful.

Rating: Null/10 (28 October 2004)

I peeped this movie out at the neighborhood GALAXY THEATER and though that cinema is underemployed and sickeningly messy, I'm still able to say I got the most out of DOTD2004. It's not a particularly brainy idea, but what it lacks in depth, it makes up for in entertainment value.
A horror movie is meant to entertain.
Every guy I know who religiously watches horror films is not an impressive individual. The audience intended for this movie does not crave depth. If you want depth, Dawn of the Dead is not for you. Spend your 8 bucks on Garden State or something.
This movie did exactly what I expected it to do. It gave me a quick wow. Well, it gave me a 2 hour wow. It immediately delves straight into action and continues relentlessly with the occasional humorous intermission complete with ironic, mismatched music choices and gratuitous sex.
My entire band joined me when we went to this movie and 2 of the 4 of us liked the original better. I am still baffled at their reasoning behind this. There was much talk about themes and moods, complexity and commentary, layers and depth, feelings and expression... It was a zombie movie.
I don't know about the common movie-viewer, but I whole-heartedly loathe the following:

bikers - bikers starting whipped cream pie fights with zombies - horrible, greenish makeup - cheesy gore

Coincidentally, all these elements were included in the original. I almost turned off the VCR when I saw that pie fight scene. One can't help wondering where Marc Summers was to start Nickelodeon's Family Double Dare. They should've wheeled out that green slime and dumped it on the zombies too. Then give them all prizes for participating.
The fact of the matter is that DOTD2004 took what royally sucked, and made it suck a lot less. Both movies are mindless (yes, even with the amateur symbolism Romero portrayed in the first), but I was definitely more impressed with the remake.
--OMGOMGOMGOMG SPOIleR ALeRT!! LOLZ--
If anyone has seen DEADALIVE, they would know of that God-awful infant zombie featured in that movie. I am so very thankful that the new Dawn didn't go too in-depth with that stupid pregnant lady and her worthless baby.
My main criticism on the new Dawn of the Dead is that that baby should have burst out of that girl in a flurry of blood and guts. Oh, and they should have shown its head splatter all over the place when they blew its brains out. I really hate babies.