Scores the hat trick

Rating: Null/10 (21 March 2004)

I use an ice hockey term in deference to this latest of umpteen recent Canadian imports: "hat trick" means scoring three goals; this movie avoids the three killer mistakes often made by horror flicks post-"Scream," and let's hope it's a trend: (1) No jokes or self-deprecating references. (2) No attempt to "explain things." (3) No lame attempt at a "happy ending." This is just a straight-up gore-fest and delivers the goods.
"Dawn of the Dead" was my least favorite of George Romero's legendary zombie trilogy (which probably puts me at odds with about 90% of his fans) so not only did I have no problems with seeing a remake, I was hoping this would be an improvement, which it largely is. It borrows elements from the original "Night of the Living Dead" and also "Day of the Dead" and retains the original "Dawn"'s premise of taking place mostly at a shopping mall. Since the satire on American consumerism isn't a particularly novel idea any more, the remake wisely doesn't play it up, in fact omits the key plot element from the original of the roving biker gang and the climactic inside-the-mall battle against the zombies. It also adds some new elements (see under "Spoilers").
Sarah Polley (Canada's answer to Uma Thurman?) finally outgrows waif status as a no-nonsense nurse working long hours underappreciated by the doctors (I'm sure nurses in the audience can dig that). There's a conversation in the hospital about a patient who may or may not be an infected zombie, but we never see him, so we never know. She goes home and just has time for the semi-obligatory steamy shower scene with her paramour before all hell breaks loose absolutely out of the blue. (We're informed this takes place in Wisconsin, although I would have preferred Pennsylvania as a nod to Romero.) Her escape sequence is stunningly filmed, much of it through her cracked car window, and reminded me of scenes in Polanski's "The Pianist" with the protagonist observing chaotic action from a strictly subjective viewpoint, making it seem as disconcerting to us as it must to her. Eventually she meets a shotgun-wielding cop played by Ving Rhames who has yet to find the star-making vehicle he deserves. This probably won't be it either, since he's not required to do much except glower and shoot, but boy is he fun to watch. The nurse and the cop stumble across some other survivors and as per the original, take refuge inside an abandoned mall. From then on if it's blood and violence you crave, you definitely get your money's worth.
****************** SPOILERS ************************

In order to jack up the tension level among the non-zombies, the absent roving bikers are replaced by some gun-happy redneck mall security guards whose sheer bloody-minded-ness is the only element that seems a little forced. (I mean heck, I was once a security guard and so was my brother, and we're both pretty nice guys for the most part.) The chief security guard, who at first rivals the fascistic army captain in "Day of the Dead," eventually changes his stripes completely and even becomes a noble self-sacrificer, but then "battlefield conversions" are a movie tradition. There's a bizarre sequence where a vaguely lowlife character straps his pregnant girlfriend to a bed and waits for her to give birth even knowing she's "undead"----hey, how's that for "commitment"! Unfortunately the director feels compelled to show us the zombie-baby---well, using the imagination's for sissies anyway, I guess. The remake expands upon the original scene with the gun store by placing it in a building outside the mall so the owner can develop a long-distance friendship with the cop, even conducting a chess match by using signs. The gun store owner also passes the time by sniping at the zombies milling about in the street, with the others encouraging him "Hey, get Burt Reynolds" or "Rosie O'Donnell." Too bad they didn't name any government officials, but then these are tense times in the entertainment field. We even see a scheme by the mall dwellers to use a dog to convey food to the gun store owner, since they're confident that zombies only eat humans, not dogs. Well, how do they know that? For that matter, why don't zombies eat one another? (Not "afraid of germs," are they?) How come it takes them so long to get inside the mall? Why would the entire military apparatus of the country just immediately disappear? (The original "Dawn" handled that by suggesting that the zombie attack had been ongoing for a while.) When the armored truck reaches the marina, how do they know which is the right boat, since the owner's dead? But then who really cares? We're here for the thrills and jolts. The ending's a slight disappointment: could have been an ass-kicker rivalling the close of "Cannibal Holocaust" but it's intercut with the closing credits and left mysterious as to what happens; gee whiz, are they angling for a sequel to the remake? Aren't there any NEW zombie stories to tell?
The actors all carry their load, especially Jake Weber from HBO's "Mind of the Married Man," which just for the record I wish hadn't been cancelled. Weber can convey a lot with a little and, being British, could play both the Kevin Costner and the Hugh Grant regular-guy roles. Fun to see Tom Savini reprising the police-chief role from "Night of the Living Dead" ----"Shoot 'm in the head and burn 'm" ---although I wish they'd used the classic exchange from that scene:
"Are they pretty slow-moving, Chief?" "Yeah, they're dead.... they're all messed up."
One minor quibble: I'm sure every modern mall must have at least one computer-oriented store, so it would have been a nice touch to see the characters go on-line trying to make contact with someone. But to borrow a line from Alex Cox' "Straight to Hell": "Still, mustn't grumble...." I'm just glad they were able to get this made and released in theaters before (if a certain incumbent office-holder gets re-elected) this country becomes a guilty-pleasure-shlock-banning theocracy altogether.....