Johnny Depp vanity piece

Rating: 4/10 (9 May 2012)

This movie is nothing but an excuse for Johnny Depp to put on make up and clothes and play a foppish character. He does it well, great in fact, but that's not a reason to make a movie. This was very much a disappointment. Too much happens too quickly and other things happen without much thought. Characters are not defined and Michelle Pfeiffer and Jackie Earle Haley are wasted. We have a vampire, witch, ghosts and a werewolf and not much scare or many laughs.. a few chuckles at the 'fish-out-of-water' aspect, but "Austin Powers" was funnier and more poignant. I didn't understand the motivations for any of the characters except the witch who curses Barnabas to be a vampire... he essentially uses his servant girl for sex then falls in love with another woman, no wonder she wanted revenge. This was a disjointed piece of distraction. Barnabas kills a bunch of construction workers, which has some scares, then he kills hippies, for laughs. He complains that killing is destroying his soul, but we don't see any reason to believe that. The sets and costumes are excellent as is the cinematography. The only thing missing is a well thought out story. The final shot suggests a sequel... which would be a curse.