What a waste of time

Rating: 5/10 (23 May 2012)

The decision to watch Dark Shadows was not based on the fact that it starred Johnny Depp, although this is a reason for some to go to the cinemas. Now the presence of Michelle Pfeiffer (Who played Catwoman and to me is the best portrayal till date) was as incentive but the main reason I actually opted to see this was because it was done by Tim Burton.
Tim Burton is known for his Gothic movies and this is no exception, one of my favourite Tim Burton movie is still The Nightmare Before Christmas. Other greats by Tim Burton are Edward Scissorhands, Sleepy Hollow, Batman (1989), Batman Returns (1992) and my all time favourite Beetlejuice (I have a lot of Tim Burton favourites).
Well enough of Tim let's get talking about Dark Shadows, the movie is based on a soap opera of the same name that premiered on ABC between 1966 and 1971. Funny although Barnabas Collins (Johnny Depp) is the main character in this movie in the soap he was introduced in the second season and grew to become one of the main character.
I haven't seen any of the episodes in the series but if the movie is anything like the series then I wonder...
This is the Eight (if am not mistaken) movie that Johnny Depp and Tim Burton have made together and it is one of the worst I have seen from both.
The main issue about the movie isn't the theme, the theme is actually well crafted and I give kudos to the customer designer and the set manager, but the movie is so unevenly paced one time you are excited then next you are dragged into a long conversation.
The Vampire has some tricks up its sleeves other than the fact that he could make you his zombie (which he did enough times in the movie), he could also bore you to death (which he did throughout the movie).
The story goes thus: In the 18th century the Collins built a huge fortune in the fishing industry in Maine. A witch (Eva Green) falls in love with Barnabas (Johnny Depp) the son of Mr. Collins, but he turned her down after some..
She out of anger and jealousy kills everything Barnabas loves, including his parents his wife and she did the one thing that witches have not been able to do for a while now, she transforms him into a vampire and had him buried alive. (Witches turning men into vampires, where have I heard that before? Oh! yeah no where) We are now in the 70s and Barnabas is dug out. He reunites with his weird descendants and begins plotting his return to power. Also in these 196 years in the ground the witch still was alive.
Will I still watch another Tim Burton movie? Hell yeah! Alice in Wonderland (which he did with Johnny Depp) is still the eleventh highest grossing, movie in the world, so Tim has got it in him to make a masterpiece just that this movie is 3 stars from being one.
If we point our focus on Depp and rest of the crew, it was a share waste of talent. Having Pfeiffer and Eva Green and making no good use of them is amazing. Depp's movie before this was The Rum Diary a movie I still don't get.
All in all I won't waste a dime on this movie this I tell you.