Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Rating: Null/10 (25 June 2003)

At least Mary Poppins had enough class not to pump her legs as she flew over the rooftops...
Granted, she and Bert did not trade faster-than-light air-blows in fine kung-fu style, with accompanying grunts (although Cockney-speakers in London no doubt winced in pain to hear Dick enunciate). But the feel of the movie was, to me, as if the director were trying to pass off this Poppins-like fantasy as reality. It became ridiculous so quickly that I must confess I did not watch it all the way to the end (yes, the cardinal sin of movie reviewers!).
But after all, what was going to change? Was someone actually going to make eye contact? Was David Carradine going to appear with Keye Luke (almost every other cliche was used)? Was gravity suddenly going to rear its ugly head? Not a chance, Grasshopper!
I can hardly believe this film won an Oscar for ANYTHING, except perhaps for "most cliche-ridden kung fu flick ever." Even then, it didn't rate. These actors made Steven Seagal and Chuck Norris look like Pacino and Hoffman. I truly don't understand why anyone other than cheap kung fu movie addicts would watch this movie all the way to the end. I found myself wishing someone would kick ME.