Stupid is right - and also sexist, boring and disingenuous

Rating: 2/10 (29 September 2011)

This film reminded me a lot of Little Miss Sunshine, a "dysfunctional family" comedy I also hated. Things that are actually way creepy and/or disturbing are played for laughs, for example:

a 13-year-old boy stalking and harrasing his 17-year-old babysitter. He is relentless: tells her upfront that he masturbates while thinking about her, embarrasses her with public declarations, texts her nonstop, cycles to her house in the middle of the night to leave a bundle of flowers at her door (long after she's begged him to stop)... If he's old enough to feel an attraction for someone, then he's old enough to understand the concept of backing off when it is made clear that the attraction is not mutual (not just that-- the girl tells him repeatedly that he makes her feel "uncomfortable"-- ignoring someone's feelings is a trademark mainly of guys who veer on, or actually are, abusive

a 17-year-old girl obsessing over a 44-year-old dad (Carrell), to the extent that she overtly disrespects his wife (Moore), who employs her as a babysitter. Her obsession reaches new lows when she snaps naked pictures of herself with the intent of seducing Carrell. There was no logic to why this character would cheapen herself so absurdly just to win the affections of a nice, but by no means charming or exceptional, family man. Not to mention, if she hates Moore for breaking up the marriage, why is she so keen to further sabotage it by throwing herself at Carrell?

a 44-year-old dad controlling his 27-year-old daughter's love life, to the point that he disowns her for having a boyfriend whose past sexual behaviour he disapproves of, even though he himself has recently indulged in that exact type of behaviour. What is it with male characters in films being so patronising and protective of female characters? Are women in audience meant to find this manly and flattering? Is this the 1950s, where sexual hypocrisy reigns supreme? So it seems in the film.

a 40-something woman (Tomei) who goes to bars on her own to get laid is totally upset when a random dude she goes home with (Carrell) doesn't ever call her. Really? Are we meant to believe the sex was that good? Why must the film depict an older woman seeking sex with a stranger be so pathetically? Oh, I know-- because only a pathetic woman would still be single at that age and go to bars seeking no-strings-attached sex. Again-- are we stuck in Pleasantville or what?

Other old-fashioned clichés forced upon the viewer include having an indiscriminate playboy (Gosling) fall for a near-virginal girl (Stone), whose purity of heart and earnest innocence no doubt compel him to abandon his reckless, emotionally stunted, promiscuous ways. To add insult to injury, the near-virginal girl initially fawns over a douchebag in a suit (i.e. the financially secure but boring guy), and is heartbroken when he doesn't propose (girls just always want a ring on their finger, don't ya know).
Amidst these pathetic story lines (compounded by some really pathetic dialogue), the only saving grace were a few well-timed and refreshingly funny jokes, plus Gosling's barely-concealed smirk for having carte blanche to do absolutely no real acting whatsoever. He merely prances around in flashy suits and flaunts his pecs.
My final quip: for a film about sexual conquests and awakenings, where was the chemistry between any of the characters, the steamy innuendos, the sensual vibes, or the actual sex? I would've killed for random scenes between Gosling and any of the two dozen women he picks up throughout the film-- or between him and Stone's quirky friend (also the token ethnic minority, who conveniently disappears the minute Stone and Gosling sink into a trite state of happily-ever-after-ness).
Or how about a scene with Moore and Bacon, who were far cuter together than Moore and Carrell? There's just not even anything in this film that could be considered a payoff. In this sense, it really reminded me of that most disingenuous of romcoms that also has "love" in the title but completely denigrates the concept-- yes, the perplexingly much-loved turd, Love Actually. Well, Crazy, Stupid Love has joined the ranks, congrats!