Indifference reigns.

Rating: 3/10 (28 February 2005)

I saw Constantine with the hopes that it was not your typical comic book movie, playing to all the audiences it usually does. I can see they didn't want to mess with the formula. Constantine lays the same cards every movie of its ilk have played. They didn't even try to stray from the mediocrity that is a dark action flick. Keanu should know better, but when Hollywood is cutting the check, I guess the rules go for anything innovative.
The Spear of Destiny, laced with the blood of the Son of God and draped in a Nazi flag, is unearthed in Mexico(!). The carrier heads off towards Los Angeles where Constantine, demon hunter extraordinaire, meets a cop who's twin sister referred him in the most unusual of ways.
Have your bad-ass anti-hero? Check! Have your dark past? Check! Have a beautiful woman who needs your help? Check! Have some fated friends? Check! Have your eccentric inventor help? Check! Fighting evil demons to prevent an apocalypse? Check! Have a *gasp* 'shocking' twist toward the end? Check! And overall, have your miserable story with unexplained scenes and unintentionally funny moments? Darn right! Seems like the same formula here. I diagnose this movie with that contagious herpes: comic-book formulaic garbage! Symptoms may include: boredom, rolling of the eyes, occasional dozing and plenty of laughs. Prognosis: watch at your own risk!