Demonically sloppy

Rating: 4/10 (30 May 2010)

Sometimes it is said about a director that there is a little kid in them; something which drives their creative energy, giving them the ability to make good entertainment. George Lucas would be a key example.
Anyway, here is the point I am getting at. The makers of Constantine, have no such 'little kids' in their imagination. This feature is a clunky, overlong, and surprising dull piece of work. It contains a vastly underwritten screenplay, an utterly sucky performance from Keanu Reeves, and most frustratingly of all, there is no action.
As dull as it is, I suppose it has a few sporadic horror charms which may appeal to some, but not me. Every twenty minutes, Keanu Reeves gets to punch or shoot something freaky, but it never lasts long. We also get to see hell a couple of times (or one vision of it), not to mention Tilda Swinton playing a boy (probably wearing a green screen bra to generate the same kind of effect as a wire removal, if you get my meaning)
This aside, Constantine has nothing to offer. It ends on a far too rushed and incomplete note, which just cries out for sequel, something it doesn't doesn't deserve. I feel more than a bit cheated by Constantine, it doesn't deliver. Do yourself a favour and skip it.