Nothing left...

Rating: 6/10 (21 June 2005)

OK, do it like this: Take one blond ex-punk rocker Englishman who's a magician, usually spending his time in a comic where critique against current society and "realistic" portrayal of occultism is the norm, and who is of the opinion that heaven and hell are just as bad - a bunch of w*nkers. Do well past ten years of dissecting the mind of said Englishman, creating a wonderful plethora of great stories, characters and depth.
Then, make this Englishman an American, dark-haired yuppie, played by what might be considered the worst actor ever (whose only real claim to fame was to star in one of the most overrated wannabe-deep action flick trilogies of all time). Place him in New York, and remove all elements of social critique, make sure all occultism is portrayed in as daft a light as possible. Make him WANT to go to heaven. remove all interesting characters, and transform the remaining ones beyond all recognition. Oh, and rewrite his entire personal history, since someone didn't like the years of hard work done by the original authors.
This is what you will end up with. A mindless, mind-numbing kinda-action-flick, incapable of stirring even the least bit of intelligent thought. The most profound thought I had during the entire film can be summed up like this: "Whoa. Nice effects, dude".
Not that it's a bad thought. I just expected more from the movie version of one of my absolute favorite comics.
Anyways, if one completely disregard any connections to an actual comic book, ignoring the title and the names of some characters - well, then one might think of this as "kind of a decent action-flick". Not great, not really mediocre (compare with the complete drivel that is "Daredvil").
In short summary - This is not Hellblazer. This is not John Constantine. This is an action flick who needed the popularity boost of the comic-book readers. No more, no less. See it for what it is, and you might just enjoy it. And for (insert deity)'s sake - go read the comic.
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