Night Cab on the Teeth Whitening Expressway

Rating: Null/10 (20 September 2006)

I was all prepared to pan this film, and yes there is a lot that I find fault with. For instance, I was going to say "Javier Bardem finally sold out!" but then it dawned on me that his overlong Pedro Santa Claus story aside, he contributed a large part to making it the slightly interesting film that it is.
I also felt that Jamie Foxx does not really know exactly who his character is. This of course is not all his fault: the transformation he went through to wiggle out of a contretemps with thug Felix (Bardem) was not believable at all. It was interesting though.
Tom Cruise kind of plays the same guy in every film. You can count on him to deliver the understated yet overworked clichés after every episode of supercharged excitement.
The cinematography is lackluster and the directing uninspired.
Trite: the sad music and the spotting of the coyotes on a desolate street  was Max the cab driver (Foxx) meant to be perceived as crying during this part?
Jada Pinkett's and Jamie Foxx's teeth are too white. Foxx's upper teeth make it look like he's wearing a mouthguard. Get your money back from the plastic surgeon! So sad that in Hollywood everyone has over-sized but perfect and glow in the dark teeth. Tom Cruise no doubt had his done as well, but as he was lit to look green (or "dark") all you could see was the structural perfection & sameness. The overwhiteness was not as apparent.
Back to Javier Bardem's Santa helper story. Do bad crime films have in common these interminable story-telling moments on the part of a crime boss?
Best acting job in the film goes to the jazz player, and the way his face goes from plump and excited full of life as he is recounting his meeting with Miles Davis, to stone cold mean and scared as he is exposed for something he's done in the past. Though probably a "good" guy at the end of it all, the audience sees both the good-hearted musician and the bloodless criminal or wannabe criminal. Kudos to that actor.
Overall, I'd equate this film with a really good episode of Miami Vice or Law & Order. (6 out of 10)