Culture clash

Rating: 7/10 (13 September 2018)

There is consensus forming that this film is a technical masterpiece with imperfect plot. I won't go into the already lauded shots and design, casting and performances; although I will say that this is the first time in my life that a film has made me actually gasp at the power of a cut. It's a masterclass in editing.
Personally, I wish this great film did not end with a suicide pact. I've read in interviews that Pawlikowski took a while to come round to this ending, so there must have been others. He's also said that there is 30% more footage which has gone unused. I would love to see an alternate ending, and a longer version of the film.
Many British and American viewers will see the lovers in Cold War as mentally ill and thoroughly tedious, while many Poles will see them as magically and transcendentally in love.
It's about culture clash. I should know because I have Polish blood and I know Poland as well as I know England, America and the 'West'.
So I want to get into what I believe is the reason why many Anglophone audiences have a problem with the characters and plot.
This is empiricism versus voodoo.
First an illustration. Why is it that you can walk down London's Oxford Street in rush hour, and nobody walks into you? And then you arrive in Warsaw and you are walked into by three separate people who are not looking where they are going, on your first day there? The reason is that Londoners are looking a few meters ahead, they're aware of the consequences of their actions, that they have an effect on the world around them, that control of destiny is in their hands and think that awareness is important. Poles often have little confidence in their own effect on the world around them, there is no point looking where they're going because taking initiative has no effect - and besides, they are not responsible, and it doesn't matter anyway because there are more powerful forces such as god and love. Just look at the way the drive, too: the highest number of road deaths in Europe, because life is not in the driver's hands but god's.
In England the stereotype of emotional repression is still valid; it has perhaps been moderated by decades of influence from American self-help books, talk shows and rising awareness of psychology and psychotherapy. Many Brits still can't really express what they really feel, or need to get drunk to sort of get around to doing so. There is a sense of independence and responsibility for one's emotions, and that this is something to aspire towards. A Brit can remain polite while hating you. And emotional responsibility can get pretty boring; if you want passion, you have to go on holiday. In this environment, suicide seems to be an utterly idiotic and self-indulgent response to being in love.
By contrast in Poland, still to this day, there seems to be a far greater culture of psychological dependence between people, there are fewer personal boundaries, there is less of a sense of personal responsibility. Reckless acts of romantic love, 'co-dependence', outbursts of devotion and rage are all accepted as entirely normal parts of life. Emotional blackmail is a standard, everyday form of persuasion. Many Poles do things with little assumption that they are responsible for their own behavior - "it's not my fault" is a pervasive phrase used in Poland; the powerful force driving the individual is presumed to be the boss, the priest, the state, the parent or the spouse. Many Poles wait to be told what to do rather than take initiative - somebody else is thought to be in control, somebody else is going to look after them. The idea that you can teach your children independence by empowering them to feed themselves instead of their parents feeding them, or encourage them leave home, is often abhorrent and framed as neglect. It's not unusual for young entrepreneurs to be told they are being arrogant, they can be laughed at or put down by their (threatened) elders rather than encouraged and praised. While "independence" has become a buzzword amoung women and young people in England and America, it's a relatively strange concept to be preoccupied about in Poland. By extension, a suicide pact can be viewed as intensely romantic and even admirable, it's the ultimate proof of a love than can transcend life and all its banality.