Aptly named Cold Mountain is completely devoid of heat.

Rating: 1/10 (23 December 2003)

Webster's defines "cold'" as "marked by lack of warm feeling." That perfectly describes this film. From beginning to end you'll squirm in your seat from boredom. This film is half as long as the Return of the King but it seems three times longer.
The highlight of the film came an hour in when my date leaned over and whispered to me, "I hate this movie." I had decided the exact same thing 30 minutes earlier. With the exception of Renee Zellwegger, the wonderful cast is wasted. Nicole Kidman weathers the civil war with her makeup perfectly intact. Meanwhile, walking dead Jude Law has a series of pointless and increasingly tedious encounters with the likes of Natalie Portman, Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Giovanni Ribisi. And all the while you keep thinking, when will this end?
What's the point of this civil war tale? There's no place like home? Especially when you've got a hot Hollywood actress from down under waiting for you? Two parts "Gone With the Wind;" Two parts "The Wizard of Oz;" Five parts "Peyton Place."