Horrendous. Don't waste your money!

Rating: 2/10 (19 January 2008)

One of the worst movies I've ever seen. Since Cloverfield's "plot" has been kept vague, I am omitting any plot details herein, but there is really nothing much to "spoil." J.J. Abrams apparently never got the concept that you have to 1. begin the story, 2. tell the story, then 3. end the story; all while keeping the viewer interested.
We never find out how the story begins. Rather, we are treated to 20 minutes of banal party where 95% of the characters have no role in the rest of the movie. Once we're into the movie we are treated to watching the 5 dumbest people in New York City ignore everything around them to go on a pointless quest. The other two million residents of New York figure out how to get at, but not these folks. The "story" never concludes but does mercifully end along with the movie resolving nothing about how we got here, what happened, what will happen next, or why we would care. The only thing we know is that some unnamed "company" just got a reprieve from the worst personnel promotion decision ever made.
We never see the coolest thing in the movie, which is the camera. Although allegedly shot on a hand-held digital camera, one has to wonder where to get this fantastic camera. It has resolution well beyond modern HD quality, records in surround sound, has unlimited batteries, a 50k candle power light, night vision to die for, and the ability to constantly shoot the "right" spot, even when the operator is supposedly running or not paying attention. The one feature it has is anti-stabilization which causes the camera to constantly jiggle, even if the character holding the camera is stopped, but stops jiggling for really "important" scenes or to let the audience "catch" something that is "cool." If the executive producers of the new Star Trek see this, they should can J.J. Abrams on the spot or require him to invest his own money.