Cloverfield: What it is and what it isn't

Rating: 7/10 (18 January 2008)

Cloverfield IS:
-for all intents, the Blair Witch Project, but with the added payout of getting to see the monster. No really, they even took the "i'm so scared" line straight from it.
-directed by J.J. Abrams, so the movie has a bit of that show's leave-you-dangling expositional structure.
-not for those with motion sickness, the jerky 1st person P.O.V. makes you wonder if no one in NY can afford a videocamera with anti-shake.
-not completely expository. Don't expect to get answers to some, or most, of the questions you may have at the end of the movie.
-filled with relative newcomers, at least 2 of whom will be break-out stars as J.J. Abrams seems to have an eye for up and coming talent.
-not the best acted movie in the world. Oh, its not "horrible", but call it a 6 out of 10 in the acting department.
-a mid-budget movie where most of the money has gone into the special effects. That is not necessarily a bad thing though.
-full of cliché' scare tactics: unnaturally long quiet then big booms or screams, sudden pans by the camera right into the monster(s), etc.
-full of plot holes. How did the army get tanks, thousands of troops, and isolation chambers into mid-town Manhattan in under 1 hour with everyone cramming the bridges?
-effective at re-creating powerful images still fresh from 9-11, i.e. paper floating down into the streets, buildings collapsing, moving clouds of dirt, etc.
-a good Americanized version of Godzilla for the 21st century crowd.
-very well promoted with the new tools of the trade; Viral tie-ins, strict control of movie details and images, internet buzz, and so forth.
Cloverfield IS NOT:
-going to become a "pop-culture touchstone" like Start Wars or EVEN the Blair Witch Project. Its not a bad movie, its just doesn't have the budget, dialogue or star power to bump it into major movie status.
-something to wait for on DVD. 90% of the fun of the movie is the theater experience of the loud sounds and the teens screaming "don't go through that door!"
-going to be winning awards for the clunky dialogue. Tries to be realistic and stylistic at same time. Meshing both makes people wince at the failed attempt. 3 out of 10 for the dialogue.
-the worst movie you'll spend 10+ bucks on. Suspend a lot of belief, remind yourself its a fun monster movie, and don't be upset you don't get all the answers at the end.