Sweet jeepers this movie was grueling to watch!

Rating: 3/10 (19 January 2008)

Cloverfield - A bunch of dumb kids have a going away party (One that's drawn out WAY too long) for one of them when some big ol' monster hits New York. That's pretty much all the movie has going for it plot wise. So not only have the writers gone on strike (if most of the dialogue in this film wasn't improvised, I'll eat my hat) but apparently the film crews have too because this is all from the pov of a hand-held camera used by either a Blair Witch fan or a monkey in a washing machine.
I liked the trailer for this film because it was all so unexpected. I had hoped they wouldn't do the entirety of this film that way because it would've been nothing short of torture. But they did, and the second half of it was. If they were going to do it all from first person, it would have been better to have say, a news camera operator helm the audience's viewpoint. I was struggling to avoid illness by the end. Are we sure Michael Bay had no involvement in this movie? Boneheaded plots and cameras on steroids are his speciality. Even my friends were looking up at the ceiling or trying other tricks to avoid motion sickness. One scene involves a flashing light that seemed bound to invoke seizures.
The film has a few scares up it's sleeve, and for the first time in forever I actually put my arms up to shield me from on screen terror. But the film as a whole, is a turd. The characters are mostly dumb or weak. There are a few cool and scary moments but when when the film's only original card to play is the very thing that also makes it a grueling process to watch, where's the fun? There's no resolution or questions or ideas explored, just a nauseatingly shot Godzilla movie. If you can tolerate it, and that's your thing, go ahead. I did not enjoy it. D