Inappropriate and overrated

Rating: 1/10 (9 December 2017)

If all films were like Closer, I'd never go to the movies again. As it is, it's a film adaptation of Patrick Marber's play, and this is the type of play that gives theatre a bad name. Marber writes in a style that "serious philosophers" will probably find very deep, but I couldn't stand it. I don't think talking about sexual details with total strangers is deep. I don't think it's deep to assert the idea that technology which is supposed to bring us "closer" actually distances us so much so that two men could accidentally have cyber-sex without knowing the gender on the other side of the screen.
Julia Roberts, Jude Law, Clive Owen, and Natalie Portman are the key players in the film, each torn between two lovers. Anyone who is past their teens knows sex isn't the way to get to know a person, but in this film, the characters think jumping into bed or having extremely frank, inappropriate discussions about sex means they're getting "closer". It's not deep, it's not interesting, and it's not even well-acted. Clive and Natalie were nominated for Supporting Oscars, but I don't know why. Natalie prances around a stripper pole in a pink wig and a thong, so I can only imagine members of the Academy were distracted. I don't think showing nudity means the same thing as showing talent, but time and time again the Academy nominates women for baring their bodies.
Teenaged boys will probably love this movie. Everyone else can, and probably should, skip it.
Kiddy warning: Obviously, you have control over your own children. However, due to strong sexual content, I wouldn't let my kids watch it.