Not close enough

Rating: 5/10 (19 July 2005)

"I love you... No I love her... Or do I love you? No, it's her... I mean you... Er..." Oh, who gives a stripper's thong about these people anyway? They deserve one another. Sure, they're all quick with the banter but one's guy's a weakling, the other's a bastard, the girls are both incredibly fickle and none of them can make their minds up.
This is a well-acted but rather smug film which offers little insight into 21st century sex and relationships. Like its characters, Closer just manipulates others with its hollow emotions and pseudo-cleverness.
And anyway, a self-proclaimed American 'waif' like Alice  with no luggage, job or place to stay  would never have made it through customs in the first place. Yet we're supposed to believe that the British Immigration Service happily allow her to stay for four years. Or do they hand out green cards to waitresses and strippers now? Sorry to be pedantic, but if a film wants to be taken seriously