"Release the Cracken!"

Rating: Null/10 (7 April 2010)

Excuse me?! Well, just for this one, it wins - as long as longevity in memory is not ensured; one expects in that kind of fare some, well, inaccuracies concerning the mythical elements, but this badness becomes mythical on its own ground.
But poor Cracken is so easily slain in the end, compared to other monsters in the same movie that, along being anti-climactic, one gets a whiff of suspicion that the Cracken stands for the plot. Wouldn't it be better to assume the guts to release some plot?
Mr. Worthington still entertains a charming dilemma: is he just buff or actually an actor? I'm afraid the film is not revelatory on this matter, but his role was in need of some charisma, but charisma is also what the -
oh, my gosh!!! what is this thing released
turning Io's (quite, quite unnecessary) presence into a mullet-faced piece of immortality
the ever-so-mannered, if not repressed, Fiennes into a self-parody, and perhaps a revenge of the English accent's netherworld upon the American Zeus' nuanced truck-driver laconic deliverance
and oh! each time one had to hear "Zeus!" as something between juice, Jews, zoos and Jesus - what an embarrassment!
bad, smoky, in-the-last minute 3-D
the maniacal, hilarious bony and quite, quite Greek sage collapsing representations between gurus and, uh, what did the Greeks have, man (but I actually like it as an ideological critique of western spirituality: not the blind, epicene, political figure of the ancient seer as in Pasolini's Oedipus, but a doom-eager caricature of Buddist import)
bla bla bla
long live the Cash of the Titans!