Trash of the Titans did release the Crap end! I meant the Kraken!

Rating: 6/10 (21 May 2013)

Don't get me wrong, I like the whole movie start to finish, but it's so disappointing. It's not like the original 1983 Clash of the Titans was any better. I'm usually fairly easy going when it comes to popcorn flicks that serve no real purpose except to exist as silly fun. Still, there is a little bit of drawbacks in this film. If you follow real Greek mythology, you will be disappointed. If you follow the original movie, then you will be disappointed, too. This film takes this myth to a new direction, while keeping the basis close to mind. The movie by director Louis Leterrier was still interesting. Surprising a movie that has a title "Clash of the Titans" and titans are only once briefly mentioned, that if you say a word, you lose it. Who the hell made the decision of placing an monster named Kraken in the Ancient Greece? Isn't that Norse mythology? Then you got Djinns in this? Isn't that Arabic mythology? The biggest change from the original 1983 movie and this was the love story between the hero Perseus (Sam Worthington) and the princess Andromeda (Alexa Davalos). They change it, to love between the hero and the immortal nymph Io (Gemma Arterton). It was rather a better love story than the original in my opinion, but still the princess made more sense since it's in the Greek mythology, and Io wasn't in this story. Anyways, Perseus is a demi-God who must rescue the princess from a sea monster sent by the Gods. By doing this, he has to kill the Gorgon monster known as Medusa who can turn any onlookers into stone and use her head as a weapon. All in all, this movie was just another visual CGI feast. The CGI is breath taking, but the way they conversion the film 2D to 3D made the movie look horrible. There are blurry scenes, and examples of with people's hair flowing beyond their heads without anything holding it. The hero is hardly likable as he doesn't talk much, the two hunters really served no role and kind of left the group before they did anything useful, the Medusa battle killed nearly everyone within minutes, including all the soldiers I actually cared about. The only actual scene I enjoyed was the Medusa fight, the combination of stealth, fighting an enemy you can't see, and arrows was pretty cool. But what on Earth were they trying to make Medusa look beautiful? The original 1983's Medusa was scary. This one makes her look like a super model with snakes on her. With all the hype behind the Kraken, you'd think it would be an epic battle but it only in screen time for a short period of time. Way disappointing. I got confused, I thought it was the Cloverfield monster or a Rancor from Star Wars: Return of the Jedi. I have to say the flute scene was a bit funny. Who knew bitch was a word in ancient time as well. About the acting. It was mediocre. Sam Worthington plays the exact same character he played in every other film he has been in. Gemma Arterton's performance was boring and emotionless as usual and even though Liam Neeson tried his best to fit in with the role as Zeus, his talent was utterly wasted. Ralphs Fiennes does his Voldemort voice for Hades which was kinda annoying. Overall: Effects looked pretty but the story was half assed and character development was non-existent. It's just mindless eye candy. Probably good for a rental or a free watch on television one day.