Boring, utterly predictable and overly patriotic

Rating: 3/10 (25 May 2009)

Perhaps my expectations of Chak De! India were too high, since the movie is so well-received on IMDb and elsewhere. Granted, sports movies aren't exactly my cup of tea, and super-mega-star Shahrukh Khan isn't exactly my favourite actor. Even so, I was very disappointed about this movie. I had hoped for something better.
What disturbs me most is the extreme predictability of CDI. Basically, we have two simple ingredients: a former hockey international, who in the past was unjustly accused of disloyalty after a lost match. That was the end of his career and reputation, and the player disappeared from the scene for a number of years. And secondly, there is a hopelessly disorganised, pitiful team of poor hockey players, who are supposed to represent India in the world series. Once we find out that our former super player is going to be the trainer of this team, we basically know everything. From that moment on, the entire movie is painfully predictable, and doesn't hold a single surprise. While watching it, I caught myself several times on saying: "Look, now Australia is going to make a goal"... and it was only a matter of seconds before Australia really made its goal.
Sure, this type of movies tend to be like that. But Gods and Saints, couldn't they have added at least a few original ideas? The entire movie is so horribly... schematic and formulaic. Look at this loose, poorly organised pack of players: one girl is nice-looking, one girl is always in a bad mood, one girl has a husband who refuses seeing anything else in her but a housewife, one girl is a tomboy, one girl is older than the rest and always making a fist towards the new coach. Reminds of the Smurf village! What we know in advance is that the new coach will manage to help them overcome their differences, forge them into a unity, and lead them towards a great victory. At least I was hoping to get to know them a little better, to witness a few interesting story lines... but nothing.
And that is precisely what I miss most in this movie: characters. Even about the Shahrukh Khan character there is little we find out, about the girls we find out next to nothing. Some argue this movie is not about Shahrukh but about the team; in my perception, however, this is a one actor movie. And with all due respect to Shahrukh, I don't think he is gifted enough as an actor to pull a movie entirely on his own. I have to admit: as Kabir Khan he is quite alright, even good. But nothing else. As for the girls: Bindia is the only one who somehow manages to catch the eye. In the case of the entire rest I miss role playing of any kind. I can't even say they were playing badly, since they weren't playing at all.
Another thing that irritates me in CDI, is exaggerated patriotism. Had it been an American movie, I'm sure many people would have reacted differently. I can tolerate patriotism and nationalism without much trouble, but not to such idiotic extent. Anyway, how credible is it that a team, after losing against Australia with 7:0, would meet the very same team again in the finale, turning them into minced meat this time? There is a lot I can buy in a movie, but not that.
Of course, the film has a not-so-hidden message: women aren't any worse at all. What a surprise! I don't know much about India, so perhaps this message is revolutionary over there (which I frankly doubt). For me it's not, and even if it were, I wouldn't need a movie like this one to convince me. The only other "message" I can accept somehow, is this: how easily public opinion can change its mind.
From the sound track, I like the title song. The rest of it is too average to save the movie. All in all, a boring and uninteresting movie, not good for anything higher than 3/10.