Mediocre

Rating: 5/10 (13 September 2010)

Essentially, this is a chase movie. It begins with a brief overview of a Roman Empire with an increasingly tenuous grip on Britain, its governor Agricola under pressure to end the threat of the Picts and their effective guerrilla warfare tactics. Enter the 9th Legion. Supplied with a native scout, (Kurylenko) who has had her tongue cut out, they are given the task of eliminating the Pict threat. Under the command of Dominic West the legion is led into a trap by Kurylenko where they are butchered almost to a man. After a botched attempt to rescue their captured general the surviving Roman soldiers, led by centurion Michael Fassbender, must flee to their own lines while being pursued by expert tracker Kurylenko and her band of Picts.
So, why the average score? To begin with we are asked to believe that Kurylenko, despite the handicap of being mute has managed to gain the trust of the Romans. We're not told how she has accomplished this but OK, keep going. When she predictably leads the entire legion straight into an ambush however, you can't help but think the director has failed to convince that the legion general (Dominic West) would so easily walk into it. A further failure of this scene is that it lacks any sense of scale. A Roman legion consisted of more than 5000 men, yet no more than a few hundred appear on screen, with even less of the attacking Picts visible. The latter may well have been due to budget constraints but leaves the viewer with the impression of a skirmish rather than a great battle.
Shortly after we are treated to a scene of the captured general who, after the failed rescue attempt by his men is surely facing a grim death. Step up Kurylenko brandishing a spear. But wait, what's this? He's been cut free and handed a sword! Surely he is not going to go one on one with the six stone soaking wet powerhouse Kurylenko? Oh dear. Yes, this was too much disbelief for me to suspend I'm afraid. A Roman legion commanding general bested by a little girl who looks like she fell in the 'dressing up' box. Sorry, but no matter how much war paint you put on her, this was laughable. What follows is more of the same as the ranks of the surviving Romans are thinned by Kurylenko and her band, culminating in a fight with centurion Michael Fassbender, which despite him emerging as the victor is ridiculously evenly matched for the most part. We're even told that Fassbender has been trained by a gladiator, yet Kurylenko with her little pipe cleaner arms is seemingly a tough opponent. Pathetic. Spare me this warrior woman 'only in the movies' rubbish Neil Marshall. It shouldn't have any place in a film of this kind. There are other flaws with the movie but these have been suitably highlighted by other reviewers.
OK, what's good? Well, there's plenty of action. Limbs and heads are routinely separated from their bodies in what is generally a fast paced movie. It's also fairly short at 93 minutes so if you have the same problems I do with this film you won't have to wait too long for it to finish. As someone else on here said, I love a good hack and slash historical yarn so I'd had high hopes for this film. Sadly, despite some decent action it falls victim to the modern day disease of cliché and political correctness. A rental at best.