Survivor III - The Outtake

Rating: 1/10 (23 February 2001)

I cannot believe anybody would sit through this bloated snoozer and think anything except "how can I get my money back"? Plusses: two fine stars, a really pretty setting and, um, er . . .
Minuses: Long, boring, tedious and uninteresting script. Bizarre half-hour of celluloid sacrificed to god/totem/symbol/athletic device "Wilson". Did anyone else notice that they actually used VIOLINS when it finally and thankfully drifted away (during another excruciating five minutes of slo-mo cinema). Did anyone else notice that Helen Hunt somehow got from her house to a detached garage without getting wet? Or that Hanks simply did not drink enough liquid to come close to surviving his first 24 hours? Or that he managed to drift 100 feet from a supercargo ship in the middle of the Pacific?
Oh, this is a truly dreadful movie. Read Robinson Crusoe instead.