Bet on this one and lose!

Rating: 1/10 (17 November 2006)

I've had more suspenseful poops than Casino Royale.
Where to begin? Daniel Craig is NOT secret agent James Bond 007. He is in fact a man-child, waving around a gun like it was his chocolate milk, nevermind that he's a poopy actor. He makes you long for Robert Hegyes. Craigers is hunky, but there are reasons not everyone can be Bond (i.e. cinnamon).
This has got to be the lamest plot ever in a Bond movie. A banker winning at a casino to fund terrorism? Come on. That sounds like a bad rerun of The Crotch Chronicles. I miss Jaws, that lady who cracked your head with her shins, and Crackers McSnaggle. You know who would be a great Bond villain? Bull the bailiff from Night Court. You talking' to me?
What I will say about Casino Royale is that some of the characters are pretty crazy. Judi Dench as M reminds me of my ninth grade home room teacher. "Meat 'n' potatas." High marks also go to Eva Green, who is NOT poopy in this one.
Overall, I do not recommend Casino Royale.