Captain Meowel

Rating: 2/10 (25 March 2019)

Well. I've watched this movie for the record, cause I had no particular expectations for it. Brie Larson is not Gal Gadot, and it was obviously seen in the trailers. However, there was a hope that such charismatic actors as Jude Law and Samuel Jackson would push it on, but alas... Jude Law's character simply didn't reveal, and about S. Jackson... I will write further.
This movie's problem is that it is not memorable. It doesn't bring emotions. There's no drama, there's nobody to empathize, it's impossible to identify yourself with the protagonist, for she, both being a usual human, and having become basically invulnerable, shows no serious feelings - absolutely. It looks like Marvel's movie-makers merely were afraid to give this "stone lump of good and justice" any kind of real human feelings - the feelings inherent in a real human. Human can be weak, vulnerable, can lose heart, can be afraid, can be merciful, compassionate and so on. Humans are not ideal, and that's why they can be attractive. In the movie, its creators obviously forgot about a simple truth: a viewer must put himself in the place of characters, he must be "catched" by their stories. Here we have an unalive, unreal superhero, whose invulnerability and "roboticness" drastically decreases interest in her. While Superman had kryptonite, while there was a drama as Superman loved a mortal woman, vulnerable for enemies, there were mortal parents, in the case of the captain there's no such thing. She doesn't love anyone, she is not tied to anyone. She is unreal, non-archetypical, fictional, she has no roots in real life.
This movie is not a comedy too. Yes, there were one or two funny moments with Fury, with Mainskrull, when I grinned. And that's all. Nick Fury, who was a severe and contradictory character, has been turned into someone quite unserious, with not very good sense of humour, slobbering over a cat, like a baby. It's awful.
Based on skrulls' metamorphness, there could be a great detective line in the spirit of, for example, John Carpenter's "The Thing", when everybody is under suspicion, and it's not clear who is who. But alas, such a possibility to waken viewers' interest was simply ruined with another questionable "twist".
The soundtrack is not memorable, inserting of the 90-s songs is out of place. It looks like they took some songs without thinking whether it would work or not. Basically, there's no 90-s atmosphere. Yes, some antediluvian computers were shown. Yes, I grinned slightly. But there was no feeling of nostalgia for the real 90-s.
Visually sometimes it's good, at times it looks quite bad (by the standards of Marvel). Generally speaking, it's made with no own director's vision and style. For example, although Zack Snyder's films shot for DC have obvious problems, he manages to make the scenes spectacular, pleasing to the eye, even if there's no action.
Basically, this movie doesn't add anything special to MCU. It's very, very boring origin story. Yes, we were shown how Nick Fury lost his eye - and we'd better not have seen that. Yes, we were revealed that pager's story. Nothing special too.
If she simply comes and defeats the purple titan, the people, who've been watching this truly great show by Marvel for more than 10 years - what will they say? I hope that Marvel's bosses will find a way to reduce the captain's powers. Otherwise, "The Avengers: Endgame" may become a turning point for this cinematic universe. People are getting tired of comics-based films, and if it's gonna become a conveyer ala "Star Wars: Episode 7-8-9-10...17", steadily supplying mediocre uninteresting films such as Captain Marvel, ruining the well-established canon - films made for the sake of the current moment, it may be the beginning of the end for so called the "Marvel Renaissance".
And well, I really don't want that.
P.S. For Samuel Jackson's apples of youth, for a few visually good moments, for one or two not very foolish jokes:
2/10