Where is the MST 3K trio when you need them most?

Rating: Null/10 (26 July 2011)

Another reviewer said this started strong. I had difficulty staying awake after a few minutes of this film. It basically fails on every level. The only way it "succeeds" is if the viewer is seeking a "feel good" pastiche of all the excellent major actions films preceding it, and doesn't care about quality or originality. Who is this movie meant to entertain, I wondered? I hope even our children will find this unworthy of note - at least that would be a hopeful sign for the future!
I must say that I did have some fun thinking of what Joel and the "robot friends" might say if they were watching this insipid, sometimes laughably bad film. But look on the bright side, if your kids are of a certain age they might beg you to get them steroids so that they too can have the body of a "superhero." In the world of "Captain Avenger," I guess ~insert your favorite steroid infused baseball player's name here~ would be President! And a movie about that person would likely be a considerably more interesting experience than this film, which is more comical (in a pathetic way) than comic book!
Add a star or two if you are a big fan of a ludicrous rewriting of history or an outright silly use of special effects, this may for you. However, for me, Captain Generica or Geriatrica is mostly what this movie felt like. "Vat ver you expecting, da Matreex?"