Not nearly gay enough

Rating: 3/10 (3 May 2016)

I think the best way to start this review is by warning potential viewers not to be fooled by all the sexually charged promo pictures from this movie. Despite the obvious "will they, won't they" Tony and Steve have been engaging in over a few movies, this one doesn't finally take the further step. In fact, I would say the real love story is between Bucky and Steve, who share some really compelling shots during the movie, as the two friends/would-be lovers are reunited again. Sadly, this is all without resolution.
I regret to say, that there isn't much in the way of plot either. CA3 tries to start up the so-called "civil war" using several different, completely disconnected threads, all of which feel quite pointless, and are hardly given enough discussion and thought process of the different people involved to really make you care about it. If you are expecting a thought provoking with philosophical ramifications Civil War storyline, I suggest you head to the comics.
These two writers/directors received a lot of praise on their previous installment "The Winter Soldier" for their complex portrayal of women (most notably, Black Widow), including their importance on the plot. I'm afraid they will not receive such praise on this movie. Natasha was little more than a beautiful prop, given how she was completely pointless to the plot, and she's only allowed a few quips here and there, in addition to her fight scenes. Sharon Carter is there only to give a Plot Related Speech to push Steve to decide on which side he was going to be (Peggy Carter needed to be fridged for this purpose), and then share a very random kiss with him. Wanda was presented as a teenager kicking her shoes because she was "grounded". For some reason, with all the talk of Sekovia and its victims, she didn't think of mention that she lost her brother there too. Actually, the fact that she lost her twin brother only months before is not brought up at any point of the movie, and she's not even shown as being sad about it. It seems like a sort of "running joke" on media right now that women do not mourn their loved ones (I guess that's what the men who write them think "strong women" are?). Tony, on the other side, is given plenty of room for being devastated over the loss of a guy he never even met. This leads him to eff up for the how many movies has he been in so far? Six? Well, for the sixth time.
This movie was also highly expected for the introduction of two new characters. One of them turned out to be really compelling and promising. The actor somehow managed to make his character likable even at the point of the movie when he was being sort of annoying, and the brilliant turnaround he had at the end served to elevate him over most of his co-stars. As for the other one, I can't believe they will actually make a full length movie with him next year, which I will skip anyway. His introduction was also weird and felt forced. There was supposed to be humor, but it was only uncomfortable. It is worth pointing out that the supposed jokes in this movie failed 90% of the time, which at some point had you begging for them to just please stop.
Arguably the best part of the movie was the fight scene at the airport (which plot wise was really pointless if you think about it), which did manage to display the abilities of all the characters involved in it and was delightful to watch. It does make you wonder, however, if the only part the writers were able to deliver was the fighting (which is practically a given if you think the amazing material they had to work with), maybe they should have given the job to someone with a more original vision and new ideas.
We could say that among the mess that this movie turned out to be, some resolution to the obvious UST between Tony and Steve could have been a redeeming quality. Marvel however, still refuses to acknowledge that same-sex love exists, and will rather have Captain America share a very disturbing kiss with the niece of the 100 year old dead woman he was actually in love with. Which makes me consider, maybe this movie is not only not gay enough, it may be too heterosexual as well.