Spectacular to the eyes, but not the ears

Rating: 5/10 (2 April 2011)

There are so few musical films produced any more, I was happy to see that "Burlesque" (2010) promised a lot of singing and dancing. It delivers, but don't get your hopes up unless you are hard of hearing.
"Burlesque" is colorful, and the ensemble dancing is great. Christina Aguilera plays Ali (short for Alice), a small-town girl from Iowa who leaves the cornfields for a taste of the big city. She settles in Los Angeles, home of the famous Sunset Strip, where a neo-burlesque club operates under the tutelage of old-time burlesque queen Tess (Cher).
Ali wants desperately to join the colorful dance troupe she sees performing each night on stage, but at first she can get no further than a job as bar waitress.
That Ali will eventually get her shot on stage is a foregone conclusion, but in the meantime you'll have to withstand an almost continuous assault on your eardrums. The music is loud, harsh, and nearly deafening. As I've said, the dancing is just fine; but this is the first musical film I've ever seen that contains not one hummable song. It's true, I can't remember what any of them sound like... except loud.
Aguilera and Cher are accompanied in their acting chores by Stanley Tucci, Peter Gallagher, Alan Cumming, Kristen Bell, and newcomer Julianne Hough.
Dan Navarro (daneldorado93@yahoo.com)