Ugh. Uggghh. I don't like it.

Rating: 5/10 (23 April 2020)

Ugh I really didn't like it. There are some positives. The dance routines are pretty cool, the dancers do a good job. The costumes and make up are nice. So the costume and make up designers get a thumbs up from me along with the choreographer. Besides that, oh boy. The script is pretty meh, the story is really predictable. Like really predictable. In fact it's kind of just Coyote Ugly except worse. I didn't like the main character Ali at all. She's probably the least amiable main character I've seen since Psycho. She's just obnoxious, rude and mean. I know she's supposed to come off as this strong young independent woman and I love that type of characters. But come on. This is a film about a woman whose only aspirations is to dance provocatively. I have absolutely nothing against doing that. But the film makes it look like she's striving for the Nobel peace price or something.
Jack, the main male love interest, absolutely deserves her. Are we supposed to feel so sorry for him for being in a long distance relationship with a girl who values her carrier that we deem it okay for him to cheat on her? Don't get me wrong. His girlfriend is conveniently horrible. But still. And the stuff he says just in general. The "want a cookie?" line (delivered by Jack standing naked next to Ali with a box of cookies to hide... him) made me dry heave profusely. The "You're definitely not gay" post-coital sentence from Ali produced a similar reaction. Like... what is this film? Who is writing these scenes and those dialogues?
Oh and I hate the sound mixing. Why do everybody sound like they're singing in a studio all the time? Even when singing on stage without a microphone? Like the scene where Nikki turns the sound system off whilst Ali is singing and they just freeze, but then Ali steps up and sings the vocals herself. She's supposed to be singing completely unsupported, not even a mic, but she sounds positive autotuned. It just takes you out of the film. It's rather ironic when Ali is this great rebel fighting for the girls to sing themselves instead of miming.
I'm sorry, I've gone on a complete rant. It's just such an overrated film. Bottom point being, just watch Coyote Ugly.