meh

Rating: 6/10 (18 November 2010)

Burlesque is visually stunning (costumes, makeup, sets, views of LA are all wows), has great music, showcases talented dancers, and has a promising cast. I really wanted to love this movie. Really did! But a flat storyline can't save this movie. Small-town girl Ali moves to the big city, overnight has a waitressing job in her dream location, and a potential love interest. She impresses the stressed boss, Cher. Cue the predictable challenge to overcome (she gets robbed and loses all her money), romantic stress (he has a fiancée), sudden break for fame (bitchy sabotage goes wrong when Ali proves she can really sing), quandary over who to trust (moneyed potential investor who may or may not have evil motives), and simple solution to resolve all the challenges her employer faces (spoiler: air rights). Xtina's vocal chops are undeniable but her dancing skills leave something to be desired. Thank goodness for rapid-fire editing to work around her. Cher is fine in her seen-it-all henhouse-mother strapped with financial problems and uninspired lines to say. She sings a couple songs but the audience doesn't get to see her in her performing glory so she's somewhat wasted in this role. Stanley Tucci is as charming and supportive as they come as Cher's right-hand man. Cam Giganget is hot!! as the roommate/love interest, Kristen Bell has moves and attitude to spare as the star being replaced by Ali, Eric Danes is sexy and dangerous as the investor/potential alternate love interest, while the incredible Alan Cumming is woefully underused in his 27 seconds of screen time. The soundtrack will be good overall, but the final song--written by Christina and specially picked to get audiences singing and dancing their way out of the theatre--is largely forgettable. Kind of like the movie overall.