The ultimate portrayal of 75% of America - IDIOTS

Rating: 7/10 (2 December 2008)

First off, let me say, this is NOT a homophobic post. I felt like I needed to say that for those people who aren't the best listeners/readers and can't figure out on their own.
This movie is the perfect portrayal of 75% of the people in America - IDIOTS WHO DON'T KNOW HOW TO STRUCTURE OUT A HEALTHY FUTURE FOR THEMSELVES. That was one of the best things about the movie though - is how it kept hammering down on the point that IF YOU DENY WHO YOU REALLY ARE, AND DON'T DO EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT TO BE DOING WITH YOUR LIFE - THEN YOUR LIFE IS GOING TO GET MESSED UP. (aka you're gonna upset people, you're gonna be unhappy and missing something inside and it's going to show, and you'll end up alone and miserable).
The movie was extremely hard to enjoy while viewing, because almost every character in the movie was an annoying, brainless hillbilly. During the first section of the movie, when they're actually up on the mountain, it had me wondering "what the heck motivated these guys to want to do this movie?". Not just because they aren't gay in real life and have to get all gay (like really intensely gay) up on each other, but because aside from the intense making out and BF'ing, they are just a couple of BORING LOSERS. Who wants to spend their life herding sheep on a mountain? Day and night? And especially in the 60's - possibly the most amazing decade in our history??? Get a LIFE!!!
Jake Gyllenhaal's character was really gross anyways. I don't really get it. If I was gay, and was going to love someone over Michelle Williams and my 2 daughters, it'd have to be a pretty hot dude like Kevin Barnes or that Shane dude from The L Word.
Anyways, the movie really picks up once they get off the mountain and get married and we start watching their lives go by at like a YEAR PER MINUTE. it's impossible to have a bad movie when you are seeing only the entertaining stuff in a couple of people's lives. There was a massive amount of foreshadowing, which made things easy to call out but none of the scenarios were ever too clichÃ© - they were all entertaining and effective.
I am still surprised it won Best Picture, but it's a very solid and very different movie. All performances were solid - Heath Ledger was great, Michelle Williams was perfect, Gylenhaal was crazy and wildly entertaining but still extremely unattractive, Quaid was believable in his role, annnnd Anne Hathaway was surprisingly awesome in her part. I still think they should have picked someone else to play Donnie Darko's part...
JACK TWIST?!??!?!
Congrats Ang Lee - your HULK was really bad... way to recover!