I want my 3 hours back

Rating: 2/10 (5 February 2007)

I hadn't seen this movie when it came out and, considering the hype it was bathed in back then, I may have liked it at the time. As it is, I watched it on DVD and HATED it for the following reasons:

Mel Gibson's tic-drenched acting. He acts with his face, not with his heart. He is especially annoying at the beginning when he is supposedly a younger man. His eyes-wide smiles and grins come off as ridiculous leering.

Gibson/Wallace and the women in his life. Gibson obviously likes to set himself up as hunk-du-jour. The most ridiculous line in any movie comes when Sophie Marceau berates him for beguiling her, saying something like, "you just have to look at me and i go weak in the knees." Give me a break.

Gibson's fright wig. Scarier than Tina Turner in Tommy. His hair made me feel like I had lice. Ew.

Tedious plotting. Homely family scene followed by rousing battle followed by incomprehensible noble plotting followed by homely village life followed by rousing battle followed by incomprehensible noble plotting, etc. Yawn.

Cringe-worthy dialogue. I wasn't taking notes at the time, but even my 13yr old kid, with whom I was watching the film, couldn't stop groaning.

Gibson's messianic complex. Probably not noted at the time of the film's release, but it is impossible to watch Braveheart today without seeing Mel-the-Messiah. Martyr like poses and positions abound, arms outstretched, beatific expressions, etc. Hard to watch.

-Overly violent battle scenes. I guess these things are the norm now, but I am getting less and less tolerant of listening to the FX-designed sounds of the battlefield, let alone close-up shots of swords and brainmatter.
All in all, Braveheart is a film by a man in love with the image of himself as heroic Christ-like martyr. I think that will be the LAST film with or by Mel Gibson I will ever see.