Get it? The title. Because you'd think they were swords, when really...

Rating: 5/10 (2 November 2009)

You know how ice-skating is flamboyant? Isn't that absolutely hilarious? ...no? Well, then this ain't for you. As with White Chicks, I have to wonder why anyone would bother making a flick where the intended audience are already making all of those same jokes, and, indeed, they needn't be made, because, for all those of us who are not into the subject being mocked(there, fashion and the Hilton sisters, and here, professional ice skating), I'm sorry to say, it already looks silly. This was directed by the duo who do the cave-man commercials, so it shouldn't be much of a surprise that it's overdone and seldom funny. The script leaves no doubt as to the fact that those who wrote it still giggle when they say naughty words. You know why Trey Parker and Matt Stone get away with that? Because they have a lot of truth in their material, and their satire is biting. This just tries to get laughs from the audience by having men behave effeminately. The characters are purely based around gags they could do, and this has next to no substance. I can't claim that this engaged me for a second. The acting is fine. Every recognizable face in this but Ferrell and Heder embarrass themselves. The plot is formulaic and utterly predictable. There is crude, and occasionally downright disgusting, stuff in this, and the language is moderately strong. The DVD contains featurettes that I will review on their individual pages, a music video, deleted scenes, a gag reel and alternate takes. I recommend this solely to big fans of the two stars. Well, the one, and then Jon. 5/10