Black Snakes on a Moaning Plane

Rating: Null/10 (23 July 2007)

There are very few true pioneering directors left, especially in Hollywood, and Craig Brewer is definitely NOT one of them. Whenever you see all the hob-knobbers, insiders, and "critics" fawning over how "genius" or "real" a movie or director is, and all the a-list actors scrambling to be involved (and patting themselves on the back for how good of a job they did), you know that 99% of the time, the crap factor will be off the scale. This is not a message movie. There are no deep life lessons learned by the characters, and no moments of catharsis. No complex social comments either. Sound just like "Hustle & Flow"? You betcha! If you like meandering exploitation flicks that appeal to lowest-common-denominator, no-IQ audiences, and you like "keepin' it real", then you'll love "Black Snake Moan". But if you want to see serious and/or subversive movies about race relations, Southern stereotypes, sexual politics and the like, you'll do best to go back to 70's cinema. Watch Larry Cohen's "Bone" and you'll see what I mean. There are no movies like that being made these days. Hell, even the old Pam Grier sexploitation/vigilante flicks are more interesting than any Bush-era, "breakthrough" green-lighted crapola being squeezed from Tinseltown's swollen, polyp-encrusted rectum. Of course, there are a few exceptions, both inside Hollywood and out, but I won't turn this into a movie list. Besides, this is my first review on IMDb.com. I'm not even sure why I picked this movie to berate. I guess I just got angry watching the DVD extras, with all those bloated, clueless, no-talent pablum-pushers trying to emulate intelligence. My first baby poo had more grit and variety.