Okay, war is hell. Got anything else?

Rating: 4/10 (25 January 2002)

You know, after the first three hours of intense shoot-em-up action and pain and severed body parts and death and the oh-god-war-is-hell-agony-and-heartbreak-and-morality-of-political-motives-qu estioned-and-dead-soldier-buddies shtick, I was pretty damn tired of this movie. I keep hearing about how great the effects and camera work was, but it's all flash and no substance, and even the flash got really boring. The movie was a rehash of Saving Private Ryan, Three Kings, M*A*S*H and pretty much every war movie ever made after Vietnam. I was praying for this movie to finally please end after five and a half hours (that's what it felt like at least, in reality it was probably closer to forty minutes). I didn't care about the characters. It didn't even dawn on me that I was supposed to care about the characters until well after I left the theater. There is no plot, no characters, no point. It's nothing but a high-budget Hollywoodized documentary.

War is no fun. I get it. Now bring something new or interesting to the table or quit wasting my damn money.