Appalling

Rating: 1/10 (13 November 2007)

Digital "motion capture" Beowulf looks more like a computer game than a movie. Anthony Hopkins's Welsh voice evidently proved infectious for the rest of the cast who turn the Anglo-Saxon epic, set in 7th century Denmark, into a succession of sub Under Milk Wood accents. Ray Winstone fights various battles stark naked, his naughty bits strategically masked in many imaginative ways. Angelina Jolie plays Grendel's Mother as a nude she-devil in high heels. Her phallic tail fails to frighten the audience. Her lack of nipples is slightly more disturbing. Laughable script is perfectly matched by crashing over the top score & power ballad. This makes Jackson's Lord of the Rings look like King Lear.