"It Made Me Long for the Sweet Taste of a Hollowpoint Bullet"

Rating: Null/10 (15 May 2010)

There is a school of thought in drama in which, the theory goes, one should try for the most natural dialogue possible - it should be exactly like life. Of course, in real life, people rarely talk like what these works show - they are incessantly droning on about deep issues; they have a litany of complaints about life; and they always, always bemoan that others - usually parents or spouses - just don't get it. BUT THEY DO! Chekhov was, perhaps, the most famous advocate of this approach. Woody Allen is another. Critics and pseudo-intellectuals love the approach, because it's all about the cerebellum. They have plenty of phrases to parse. And they think the approach is so "real." (If audiences wanted reality, they'd stay home and look at each other, instead of going to the movies.) It appeals to their fantasies of sitting in cafes and talking for hours about their philosophies of life. Wanna buy a ticket to that?
Today, I watched "Before Sunrise" and "Before Sunset." I will confess openly that, had Julie Delpy not been so hypnotically beautiful in the first film, I would not have watched the second. Both films are from the "it will be great if we just ad-lib everything" school, which is almost never the case. Both films are merely a series of duets between two actors who believe with all their hearts that they really have something to say about EVERYTHING. And they do. It doesn't matter where the scene is set, or what time of the day or year it is, every scene is going to be about one thing only: Two people talking.
In the race to see who the bigger pretentious ass is, Ethan Hawke wins hands down. He's so very, very sensitive. Of course, he's just that way because he wants to bed Delpy. He's not really sensitive to his wife. He reveals quickly to Celine (Delpy) that he only married her because he got her pregnant. But, he's devoted to his son - he openly expresses his longing to be with him "every second," even though he's willing to miss his flight back home in order to hit the sack with his French fascination. He comes across as one of those guys who's afraid that, if he stops talking, she'll have a moment to tell him that he's a pompous jerk and run away. For her part, Delpy seems the poster-child for the discontented female and never seems to be that excited about their conversation. In the first film, she comes off as a girl looking for a thrill to write about in her journal. Jesse (Hawke) could have been anybody. In the second, she's still discontented and what better way to ease that then to see what her one-night stand is up to now.
From the moment they met in the first film to the moment the second film ends abruptly, these two talk about every possible subject in the deepest, most pretentious terms. This isn't a romance; it's a mock Mensa meeting.
What was most disappointing to me, however, was the utter lack of any real connection between these two people who can't stop talking to one another.
The acting, contrary to being as "natural" as the dialogue, is instead strained. I never had a moment's doubt that I was watching actor's act. The art of acting is not the art of writing. Actors take the words of others (in most cases) and breathe life and immediacy into them. That is so much harder than just making it up as you go along. And it is, ultimately, much more entertaining. A writer crafts characters for actors to play. Here, there are no real characters, just two people trying to impress each other with how interesting they are. Sadly, they are not. Empty words from empty people.
Obviously, there are many who have posted who enjoy this long road to nowhere - maybe it touches their memories in some way; maybe some just read that Ebert liked it, so they figure they have to, too, or they can't be considered intellectuals. But, for me, these films are shorts that have been stretched excruciatingly. If you're looking for a romance, you won't find it here. Just two people talking at each other. You can see the same thing at Denny's any night of the week.