Stiff, uneven, and preachy!

Rating: 3/10 (10 March 2018)

I knew it was going to be bad when the film opened to a horrendously auto-tuned Emma Watson. Why ... when Hollywood is TEEMING with incredibly gifted actors who can both sing and dance ... do they insist time and again on casting actors ... in MUSICALS ... who can do neither? Maybe Emma looked the part of Belle ... but that's all she resembles in the character. She lacks the confidence, charisma, spark, and energy of the animated Belle and her vocals are downright puny. Luke Evans has the talent for Gaston, Josh Gad is fine as LeFou, Ian McGregor while not sounding French in the slightest at least has the vocal talent for Lumiere ... if they had to have Emma why not dub her over like they did for Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady??
And then, I understand that Gaston is the narcissistic, brutish, mysoginist, obsessed and stalking Belle ... not taking "no" for an answer... he's the bad guy, I get it. And we the audience are shown why we should dislike him within his first 30 seconds on screen. But his first interaction with Belle is odd to say the least. He approaches her with a lovely bouquet of flowers, and politely asks her to dinner. She looks at him with a disgusted incredulous look and says "no." It's unclear whether this is the first time 1. she's met him or 2. he's asked her out. But if either of those things are true ... Belle was kinda b****y to the guy. I'm a woman, she's free to say no for whatever reason she wants, but if a guy brought me flowers and nicely asked me to dinner I'd at least attempt not to grimace. I know this guy's a jerk and he vows to keep pursuing her which is a total d**k move, but their first encounter doesn't give her any reason to be hostile, and even their second encounter feels like she's overreacting. The movie doesn't make me hate/loathe Gaston enough to want to see him treated badly ... which Belle does. And it makes me dislike her, not him.
Actually Emma feels stiff in the whole movie, it's almost like they bad cgi-d her to mimic realistic movements so everything looks unnatural.
And perhaps worst is Disney with their ham-fisted political messages. It's not enough for Belle to be the quirky odd-ball because she's smart and enjoys reading ... now she ALSO has to be an advocate for female equality and secretly teaching girls to read. An issue I totally agree with, but why does it have to be done so sanctimoniously and heavy-handed?
Belle's father stopping to get the rose was STUPID. You escape the wolves and the creepy possessed castle but then have to stop for a rose? I think your daughter would understand with your life and safety on the line if you forget her damned flower. Her dad deserved to get caught. And why they chose to cast Kevin Kline as Belle's father I really don't understand. He wasn't a crackpot scientist, he wasn't a zany kook, and he wasn't even that convincing as a loving father ... he wasn't endearing on any level.
The beast is too cartoony to be frightening, I'm sorry but Emma Thompson (whom I love) is just no Angela Lansbury. The beast's backstory was unnecessary melodramatic drivel. Belle's backstory was just depressing and made us lose focus from the primary story. The plot just meanders all over the place, it's an absolute mess and everything dilutes from the primary plot line so it loses all its potency by the end.
Some of the singing talent in this film is absolutely outstanding which only highlights how terrible the leads are. I don't understand why you'd need famous actors for roles that are 90% CGI ... why not get stronger vocal talent? It would have vastly improved the film.
There are some moments that are stunningly beautiful and proof of the magic that can be real-life vs animated films ... but they are few, far between, and never at the right moments. The musical numbers never even approach magical which is really disappointing as those were most of the high points in the animated version.
The crescendos all fall flat, the whole film feels anti-climactic. Nothing builds, there's no momentum. The pacing of the movie is all over the place, some parts way too slow and other things felt rushed. This film tries to distinguish itself from its animated predecessor but it's like Disney forgot that many consider Beauty and the Beast to be the best of all the animated Disney films. Every change they made only served to make it worse.
The animated film is vastly superior. Don't bother with this one.