The whole package of everything we loved, except 'the love' itself

Rating: 6/10 (3 June 2017)

The opening scenes of Beauty and the Beast are very hard to watch. This film is such an accurate blow by blow mimic of the 1991 Oscar winner that it even nails the timing between lines. Unfortunately this is a live movie with real actors, and actors need timing to give convincing performances. there is no timing here. The movie goes from one beat to another in spectacular fashion, and never catches its breath until halfway through the picture.
The highlight is the art direction. Beauty and the beast takes the gilded, spiralling and flowered motifs of Roccoco to the extreme, and the beast's castle looks like a big gold/brass jungle. The negative is that in order to see all this in full glory, director Bill Condon pulls his camera back so far that it becomes pretty obvious that we are in a sound stage.
Emma Watson has all the beauty of Belle, but not enough of the charisma. She is small, composed and vulnerable, and strangely unimpressionable. During the Be Our Guest number, she stares at the spectacle as if she on her forty fifth take and in need of a coffee. Her singing voice is fine, but she underplays her numbers.
How much credit to give Dan Stevens for his performance of the Beast, I'm not sure. Together with the painters/animators of his face, he does bring some humanity but not a great deal of character. As for the other inhabitants of the castle, The CGI bring Lumiere, Cogsworth and Mrs. Potts to life impeccably, but makes the mistake of minimizing their facial features, thus rendering out their character. What we get are not humans cursed with the form of house ware, we get house ware that talks and moves.
The best part of the movie is the middle act; between the second wolves attack and the iconic Beauty and the Beast dance scene. Condon tries to play cupid and get Belle and the Beast to fall in love. The script helps him by giving him some admirable new material to work with, but he cuts his these contemplative scenes too short. As a music number Beauty and the Beast succeeds in summoning a bit of warm and fuzzy nostalgia. This is the only song which comes close to making you feel like you were watching the material for the first time. Whats missing is the chemistry.
Condon stages a chaotic rendition of the fight between Gaston's mob and the Beast's army of house furniture, leading to Gaston and Beast coming face to face. Condon falls short here too by not giving them much of a fight. He also rushes the final spectacle of the movie where the beast is turned back into a prince. Belle watches and doesn't even flinch. She takes one looks at him and inherently seems to know what is going on, then they lock lips. The transformation of all the others (back into humans) is done with a bit more flair, not to mention humour.
Minus the muscles and singing voice, Luke Evans makes for a realistic Gaston, but it is his side kick 'gay' LeFou who hogs the spotlight. More than any individual, the imagery itself is the real star of the show, and there is too much of it. the scenery is over lit, it goes on forever and the camera never stays still. There is enough spectacle that you become almost numb to it.
Beauty and the Beast leaves you feeling depressed for all the people who Disney is cheating out of they're money. the movie itself feels like merchandise in a Disney store. It's a superficially enjoyable carbon copy of something real.