Pretty terrible

Rating: 3/10 (6 April 2016)

If we learn anything about the world from Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, it's that Jeremy Irons deserves his own line of Alfred movies. And the score by Hans Zimmer is better than it needed to be. Other than that, the movie is a total waste of time, an overlong 151 minutes.
Ben Affleck acts like he's on opioids, Henry Cavill has the charisma of a Pet Rock. I don't mind checking my brain at the door of an action movie, but we have to believe for a whole 151 minutes that Batman (just a rich, spoiled brat), could ever realistically give Superman (a super-powerful alien) a decent fight that wouldn't end with Batman's head punched clean off.
Wonder Woman appears almost out of thin air, and she rides in real planes you can . . . see? That ain't right. And Jesse Eisenberg channels his inner meth head in one of the worst performances in movie history. I couldn't tell whether he was acting or simply having flashbacks caught on camera.
The plot never coheres, the build-up never pays off properly, and none of it makes much sense. I'll try to explain it, though. Batman doesn't like Superman because he saves everyone from total destruction but causes a lot of death and destruction in the process. They could join forces but they each have their own idea of justice and they finally agree to buddy up because Lex Luthor made a big beastly thing out of Zod's fingerprint and some kryptonite. But Wonder Woman has to help, so she does.
The End.