Less Fun Than Anyone Could Have Imagined

Rating: 1/10 (24 March 2016)

Five films into their stewardship of the Batman legacy and DC expanded-universe-in- waiting, and we are seeing the serious limits of Christopher Nolan and his team's abilities. What is the most striking is that those flaws stem from what, in any other genre, would constitute a strength (as evidenced by the recent Interstellar): a profound sense of pathos, and fixation with characters who are obsessive and frail.
Batman V Superman is three things in one, and already that should be a bad sign for anyone expecting a satisfying experience beyond mere fan service. It is a new Batman. It is a sequel to Man of Steel. It is also the first Justice League film. it's hard enough to pull even one of these off properly, as Man of Steel sadly demonstrated, but three? Those can hardly be fair expectations, and yet, team DC believes we wanted all this in one helping.
Man of Steel was the dourest Superman film ever made. You could even argue this isn't Superman at all, given his constant scowl, anger and fear, and his apparent disregard for human life, as showcased in a final city leveling rumble that was spectacular as it was non-sensical. Except without it, you could never have this film...
If you thought our new Superman was an emo sad sack, wait until you meet the new raging, nightmare-crazed Batman. Ben Affleck does wonders with slim material, and at least the plot, contrived as it is, gives him genuine reasons to hate the man in the red cape. If you're even awake 90-minutes into this bleak, depressing mess there's even some joy to be had in watching them go at each other, and the moment many people had dreamed of one day seeing on the big screen often comes close to justifying all the effort and expectation... and then suddenly things veer back to a generic climax. The design is a bit of a letdown, especially an underwhelming CGI baddie with unfortunate resemblances to Lord of the Rings' trolls, but the writing is what crucifies the film: if you thought Batman's reasons for hating Superman were a bit flimsy, the moment that brings them together is beyond contrived and ridiculous.
I understand this is all an attempt to go a bit darker and more realistic than the Marvel universe, a willingness to try something different that, in principle, I can only applaud. But must these films be so dull, so charmless? Batman and Superman can only play off each other if they are a bit different. Here there is so much angst on both sides they cancel each other out.
The only moment that conveys any real excitement is the introduction of Gale Gadot's Wonder Woman. Not only does it ratchet up the silliness a bit but it also delivers a real sense of fun that is sadly missing from the rest of the film.
A lot of that is down to Zach Snyder's confused direction, treating each scene as if it were trailer material and strangely mangling the action scenes, none of which have the precision and clarity of Nolan's outings (or even Superman Returns for that matter), but the story on display is also clumsily told. As a result, much of the fancy effects and choreography fall flat because of dramatic stakes that are either murky or downright inexistent, in a way reminiscent - frighteningly so in the case of one dream sequence - of Snyder's own vacuous Sucker Punch.
Please D.C. universe, lighten the tone a bit next time.