Kung Fu Ping Pong Panda

Rating: 6/10 (12 September 2008)

BALLS OF FURY is not about ping pong. It's about Being a Man. It's about Honor. It's about uplifting the Human Spirit with--ah, who am I kidding? It IS about ping pong.
Starring Dan Fogler, George Lopez, Maggie Q, and the guy who does the second best Christopher Walken impersonation in the world – Christopher Walken (dressed like a geisha slut and sporting a 'do more audacious than Gary Oldman's in BRAM STOKER'S Dracula).
Walking that fine comedy line just above Adam Sandler and Will Ferrell, BALLS OF FURY is so wilfully asinine it succeeds.
Directed by Robert Ben Garant and written by Garant and Thomas Lennon (renowned for his Officer Dangle on TV's RENO 911, with a penchant for wearing tourniquet-tight shorts) BALLS is a journey deep into the dark heart of underground ping ponging, where Feng (Walken) gathers the best players from around the world to take part in a sudden death (literally) competition for--well, I don't think the plot-writers got further than that.
Lopez is the FBI "Secret Agent Man" who enlists the aid of ping pong prodigy and Def Leppard fan, Randy Daytona (Fogler, a child star now grown lazed and portly on Vegas matinees) to infiltrate Feng's operation and nab him - for what, I still can't remember.
Excellent performances (especially from Fogler) and a highly stupid script keeps BALLS on its toes: James Hong as the blind mentor; Jason Scott Lee as a fried-furious kung fu antagonist; Diedrich Bader as a fruity courtesan, Thomas Lennon as a wild-eyed German champion who's wardrobe choices somehow emulate Officer Dangle's - hip-hugging leotards and shorts so tourniquet-tight we can see his balls of fury.