Impressive review spamming

Rating: 1/10 (10 January 2018)

The biggest feat of this movie is how many paid spam reviews they managed to stuff in so that it'd look a must see. But they overdid it and the effect is rather comical. One would have to be blind not to see it, nothing we wouldn't have seen before, but this time they went full retard and twisted the spam knobs all the way up to 11. Still at 7.7, whereas it'd actually belong somewhere around 3.7.
The actual movie has nothing going on for it, strictly made for an early teens audience. Trying to make everything look cool but overdoing it, amplifying the spam review effect until it looks like a pile of dung being propped up by makeup, samba costumes and antique audio tech.
And the music, the overpowering music everywhere. Like Cloud Atlas, the disconnect between music and nothing on screen wakes you up to realize how you're being manipulated by the sound track to love this steaming pile of hollywood studio diarrhea.