Thoroughly Disappointed

Rating: 3/10 (30 April 2018)

This movie has certainly made history. A film that has so much going on and still manages to be boring just has to be some sort of a record. I went to the cinema with so much hope and enthusiasm and left wishing I'd kept my cash instead. The fact that so many characters leave no room for any sort of character development probably comes as a surprise to no one, and yet every single person in the film managed to annoy me at one point or another. The only exception to that rule was Stephen Strange, whom I've come to completely adore. I've always disliked Tony Stark so I was truly sorry I didn't get to see him disappear in a cloud of poop-colored dust but at that point I was almost beyond the point of caring. Black Widow, another one of mine top runners for the character I despise the most, thankfully did not have much screen time, and yet more than most. Spider Man - more like Pathetic Spider Boy, amirite - was once more delegated to being Iron Man's most faithful groupie, and poor Bucky had maybe three minutes of screen time (after finding out that Hawkeye was not actually in the movie, he was basically the main reason why I really wanted to see this steaming pile of hot garbage, so another disappointment there).
Also, considering the number of characters who died in this, we can be almost certain that they won't stay dead, otherwise Marvel wouldn't have anybody to make movies about anymore, unless they want to bring about Squirrel Girl. So any emotional impact any deaths may have caused was non-existent. Most of the jokes fell flat, and even though the storylines were woven together almost masterfully, it did nothing to disguise the fact that this flick was basically just another pathetic cash grab. And boring to boot.
And to add insult to injury, after I sat through the entire credits, I was treated to the promise of Captain Marvel. Horay. We don't need another character up in here, we really don't. And especially not Carl Manvers.
Not worth the cash, not worth the hype, not worth another word.