Take off the 3D glasses, and it's a glorified Ferngully!

Rating: 5/10 (14 January 2010)

I was sceptical about how good this movie would actually be after hearing such relentlessly gushing praise as 'the best movie experience ever' and so forth. But all reservations forced to one side, I grudgingly payed nearly £18 to go and watch it with my daughter. Presumably the price was so high for patrons so as to enable them to procure the National Health-style plastic 3D glasses. Glasses indeed, which provoked the placing of a sign above a large cardboard box outside the auditorium stating 'please place 3D Glasses in here'. No chance of that, matey - I payed for 'em, I'm keepin' 'em. They don't work on my TV though, I'll just wear them for sunbathing.
Anyhow, on to reviewing this absurdly profitable movie. I do have to say straight off the bat - the 3D is fantastic and unlike anything you will see on TV with those old red and cyan or blue cardboard glasses. The effects really do jump at you and the 3D layers (parallax or whatnot) seem to stretch to infinity. Very impressive stuff! However, prior to Avatar commencing there were some appetite-whetting 3D advertisements on screen with equally eye-popping visuals. One advert in particular, which I had seen on TV previously in 2D (rather drab and average to be honest) came to life in glorious 3D in the cinema. Sadly, this is the same feeling I had upon watching Avatar. For starters, the novelty of the stunning 3D wore off about a third of the way through the film. Secondly, the characters are certainly not 3 dimensional. In fact, they are pretty dull, including dear old Sigourney Weaver, who at least tried to make the most of a pretty run-of-the-mill script. Also, aside from the 3D technology, I'm afraid it's all been done before.
If you have seen an old cartoon movie called 'Ferngully: The Last Rainforest', (arguably a deeper movie in emotional content) you've already pretty much seen the plot. Put it this way, whoever came up with the idea for Avatar has most definitely seen if not been inspired by, Ferngully. But here we have humans destroying the forests of a gigantic alien species rather than your common or garden diminutive fairy-types. Throw in an afterthought of an alien-human love story, (oh, yawn) some recycled components of Cameron's-own 'Aliens' weaponry (check out the people-manned walker robots) and you have Avatar. I have noticed that some reviewers on here complain about people pointing out that there is not much plot or character development, but I would like to say something about that. As a 3D experience, it works brilliantly. It's like a theme park ride where you don't need a plot or characters, just sit back and enjoy the thrill. But unlike a thrill ride, which is what it is, once you take off your 3D glasses, you are left with an average, recycled story, flat characters and moderately impressive special effects.
The large blue, ultimately heroic aliens are pretty lame in 2D and even with glasses on, they still look very CGI. I would suggest that some people lauding the 3D Avatar should watch it in 2D, then review it as a movie rather than relying on their spec-assisted peepers to make their mind up for them, as the dazzling imagery appears to have dulled their other senses. To be honest, if the cinema was showing 2 hours or so of men fishing, or riding a roller-coaster or even eating spaghetti in 3D, rather than screening Avatar, I suspect those same people would be insisting that the fishing, roller-coaster, spaghetti film was 'the best movie experience ever.' Some people are easily pleased, and as shallow as a puddle.