Loooonnng bizarre trip

Rating: 5/10 (21 December 2018)

Walking out of the theater and I am not sure what just happened. It was a 2.5 hour mixture of Avatar, Indiana Jones, National Treasure, Starship Troopers, Jaws 3D, and He-Man.
I can't help but think that the writers & producers ate bags of mushrooms when they were concocting the story and editing the scenes. It was like a fantasy bedtime story cartoon that lasted two and a half hours.
The glacier sized crab Jason Momoa rode into battle was so big it could have stepped on Godzilla. I am not knocking this as badly as it probably sounds but this film really made me feel like I was on drugs - or should have been to fully appreciate the story being told.
The costumes the characters wore - Patrick Wilson's metal mask frowned when he got mad... I'm not joking - were absolutely ridiculous. Nicole Kidman's dinosaur shoulder pads were something out of the Road Warriors closet from 1989 Summer Slam.
I could keep going but you wouldn't believe me until you see it yourself. Enjoy!