Aquadumb

Rating: 4/10 (30 December 2018)

I give this movie one star for each letter of the word that best describes it: D U M B = 4 stars. In this current age of overhyped superhero films this movie is a formulaic as they get. Every single occurrence from the ostentatious opening voice-over to the sun rise over dear dad's lighthouse is utterly predictable and poorly produced. I am ready for a superhero film that doesn't try to rest on the tired laurels of "stunning" cgi because, guess what, we've seen it all and we are at full capacity for these expensive light shows. Give us, instead, a story, some actors and a well-written screenplay. I more than understand that this movie could not have come off without some cgi but this movie relies on it and would truly be nothing without it; it exists as a 2.5 hour fireworks display with zero substance. It's got a few big names earning, hopefully, very large paychecks in order to fund their next real movie (i.e. Willem Defoe, Nicole Kidman) but overall I was embarrassed for them having to stoop to this level. In fact, I was kind of embarrassed sitting in the theatre proving I'd paid real money to see this. Now, I do have a soft spot for Jason Momoa because he was a great Khal Drogo and seems like a genuinely likable guy. I wanted to like him in this but I couldn't due to an abysmal screenplay that no actor could make sound believable. Too bad. All in all, I'd say this is a perfect movie for 10 year old boys.