Does DC now stand for Dumb Cartoon?

Rating: 2/10 (26 March 2019)

A simplistic cartoon of a story, with shallow, two-dimensional villains and predictable cardboard cut-out heroes, speaking painfully-feeble dialogue between the frequent and overblown fight scenes. The superhero genre doesn't have to lack nuance and depth to this extent, as several of the Marvel movies have demonstrated, so I assume the film makers were deliberately aiming at the most undemanding under-twelves with this movie. For everyone else, the artists and designers involved have worked hard to compensate for the lack of any emotional weight, and anything even approaching an interesting plot - so there's a wealth of gorgeous visuals to be distracted by; but there are scenes that are so excruciatingly awful that no amount of trickery can save them. The moments of "triumph" are so contrived and hokey that the obligatory orchestral score which swells up on cue is downright embarrassing to sit through. I defy anyone not to squirm when Aquaman steps fully-uniformed from a waterfall, or when he stares dramatically at the bad-guys through the prongs of his trident. As feeble and trite as this movie is, it doesn't fail as badly as it ought to because recent DC movies have set the bar so low, but nothing except the visuals will move you, intrigue you, or leave you wanting more.