Beware

Rating: 1/10 (28 December 2003)

Beware, my friends. Though bold and striking, this is not a movie that should show its face in the new millennium or any era of artistic expression evolved beyond adolescence. Casual film-goers will probably be impressed at the scenery, the grandeur and the theatrics as I was when I was 16. But years later, I've matured a bit, and I am absolutely horrified and sickened at how I was duped. (It's not unlike the feeling of rummaging through your old 80s wardrobe and seeing those "cool" parachute pants, acid-washed jeans and Miami Vice sockless-loafers accusing you from beyond the grave!)
Not all of you, but an (enlightened?) minority WILL BE OFFENDED by this movie. Certainly the veterans of Vietnam will smell something rank about how Mr. Coppola made such a pretentious carnival out of that truly humbling and difficult time. But what I found utterly damning of this film, despite the best efforts of performers, were the atrocities that Mr. Coppola committed for the sake of his magnum opus. A bull was slaughtered live and on camera just for some added gore (of which there is no shortage in this movie). Acres of beautiful, Filipino countryside were ignited with Hollywood napalm (gasoline). And last but not least, an entire culture was slandered beyond belief to a degree from which they may not have yet recovered.
A few years ago, a New York radio personality gained enormous popularity with his irreverent and vulgar on-air antics. I admit that at the time I was amused by the novelty, but then I grew up. It may be a few decades yet, but I have enough faith in human/artistic evolution that this movie will similarly be relegated to its proper place as a monumental but shameful part of our ever-growing history.
My advice to those of you with unquenchable curiosity? Before contributing to the popularity and profits of this production (as I foolishly did), borrow a copy of this movie from someone and watch it secretly, as you would a horrible car wreck on the side of the road.