The dog has the best lines

Rating: 3/10 (25 July 2004)

I expected stupidity from this film, and I wasn't disappointed - it's stupid, awright, damn stupid, and although it's not a total waste of time because --- POSSIBLE SPOILER --- Ferrell's on-screen dog has a great exchange of dialogue with the bear --- END OF SPOILER --- it's still purdy damn stupid. I wasn't expecting subtlety (and I didn't get any), I'm a watcher of SNL and I know better than that, but I was hoping for a possible shred of intelligence to rear its head somewhere during the proceedings. No such luck. Applegate is adorable but she has a thoroughly thankless role here -- she has to be (1) smitten with Ferrell's character while still (2) throbbing with personal ambition and (3) willing to do anything to achieve her goal but yet (4) dreadfully sorry when she does get what she wants while still (5) trying to maintain a decent relationship with Ferrell's character although she's (6) thrilled to have gotten what she wanted all along. Sounds like a complex role for an actor, but guess what? It's a shallow as the day is long (sorry for the mixed metaphor), just like the rest of the film. Shallow can occasionally be ok, so long as there are actual jokes and/or humorous situations, but this isn't funny, not really. It's just sad, as Ross Perot would say, and to use another one of his famous phrases, it's a dog that won't hunt.