First MST3K Worthy Movie of 2000

Rating: 1/10 (12 April 2000)

Plainly put, this movie was horrible. The attempt to satirize the greed of the 80's was neither original or well done. What's lacking in this movie? Basically everything, but here's a quick outline:
Plot- Obviously the directors found no need for a plot to be included in this movie.
Acting- Bale will win an award for this one, I do agree. But saying it will be an Oscar is absurd. The only award he's going to win for this is a Razzie (Worst job of acting for the Year). Also, the movie as whole (assuming no other movie can equal it this year) should do at the Razzie's what American Beauty and Matrix combined did at the Oscar's. The casting and acting for the other characters was horrible, but then again they weren't given much to work with.
Comedy- The only thing they semi-succeeded with was comedy in the movie, but not for the reasons they hoped. While we were supposed to laugh at the depraved nature of the greedy man of the 80's, I instead found myself and the other 300 in the theater that didn't leave half way through (which about 100 did) laughing at how stupid the things he did were (beyond psychotic) and how useless many of the sex scenes, dialogue, etc. were.
Ending- Like plot, the directors found having an ending unnecessary. I stayed in the theater (prescreen for University students) because I figured it would have a decent ending that might make me think and make the movie bearable. Wishful thinking.
In summary, don't waste your money or your time on this movie in the regular or dollar theaters. Once it gets past those in a month, don't rent it either. Don't even watch it for free on HBO... your time has to be worth more than that. Watch the cartoon network or dumbo or something. The only time this movie might be worth watching is once the producers of Mystery Science Theater 3000 get their hands on it and make fun of it (see the worst 100 movies on IMDb for examples of how MST3K can make bad movies bearable). However, this movie is so grotesque at points, they probably can't show it on cable. It's the Devil's Advocate with more useless sex and absolutely no plot.