Stupid Explorers and Predictable Script

Rating: Null/10 (12 May 2017)

I shan't bore you (or me) to death with a long-winding review. I've just got back from a 12:30 showing (12 May) and I just want to put my feet up and have a nice cup of tea.
So... straight out of the stupid book, let me highlight the gormless colonists'/explorers' actions:
*SPOILERS*
1. Don't venture off to another planet to check out a message/climate. I don't care if you don't want to hop back into your sleeping chambers. Compose your heads and get back to your original mission. 2. Don't wonder off to relieve yourself in a unfamiliar forest. Either hold it in, or whip it out where you and your skin pipe can be seen. 3. Don't probe unfamiliar vegetation. It could have spores; and they could become airborne. Why take a risk? 4. Don't hug an infected man that is gyrating like a kid with ADHD whacked out on blue Smarties. What's wrong with you? 5. Don't transmit "Quick, help!" messages to your colleagues and not be clear. "You're breaking up, repeat!" Gimme a break. 6. Don't sit on the floor so an alien life-form can pounce on you. Pick your arse up and kick the little bastard. 7. Don't come running in all guns blazing like Duke Nukem and then slip on the floor. You'll look a right tit. 8. Don't aimlessly shoot your firearm and ignite fuel canisters. 9. Don't separate yourself in little groups in a unfamiliar alien building. Stick together; don't wonder off; make a plan; ask questions. 10. Don't wonder off and wash your face in a darkly lit room. Tend to your hygiene and wounds within the group. 11. Don't look into the egg chamber. Of course it isn't "perfectly safe", you berk. 12. Don't go near David when he's holding his reed instrument. He'll either force you to carry a tune, or stick it in your windpipe.
Also, I cannot tell if the film makers thought they were being clever with the android deception? As soon as the David/Walter kung-fu session was over, it was blatantly clear it was David all along. I mean, even a brain-damaged lettuce leaf would know that. The conclusion felt off too; as I didn't expect the film to close when it did. There were around 20 people at the screening and I heard a collective groan as the credits rolled, as though the room was saying: "Is that it?"
The film looks nice I suppose; and the David and Walter scenes were interesting.
This is vprice signing off for a brew.