Lovely story about a boy who can play a flute.

Rating: 4/10 (24 May 2017)

This is a movie about a boy named David. You see David learned how to play a flute in Prometheus and now he is a true master of fingering. And boy, he can finger well. Everyone experiences this in this story. You remember our lovely Doctor Shaw who had super abilities to conduct cesarean on herself and run straight? Fingered. Those white dudes whom everyone wanted to bore with questions? Fingered. The new crew of Covenant that no one really cares about because I guess we don't even remember their names? Fingered. Charming Walter whom you almost pity. F I N G E R E D.
This is also a movie about a great lesson in economy – how to reuse the same script over and over again, hoping that no one can notice. Strong female character – check. Spaceship with crew who make a lot of bad decisions – check. Eggs and idiots feeling risqué – check. Final monster send off into the deep space – check.
What this movie is not is a horror movie. I mean how can you expect anyone to be afraid if the script is one big horror trope? Go into the dark basement – check. Go alone to wash yourself when the monster is out – check. Have a shower and play loud music when the alarm systems go off – check. Watching this made my forehead hurt from the constant facepalm.
Reading reviews made me ponder the condition of modern society. I mean, does it really take a few lines from Byron, Shelley and a bit of cliché Wagner in the background to make people think that the movie is deep, meaningful and philosophical? If so I can't help but cheer for David's love for fingering. I mean - creating. Hope it continues in the next installments to come. The rumour has it there are still 6 to come. (Can someone please take the series away from Ridley, I think it is too much for him to handle)
Special effects are lovely though. Eye candy.
PS. If you hoped that the director listened and made the scientists smarter, well: no. If anything they are dumber.