What Did You Expect From Paul Anderson?

Rating: Null/10 (15 August 2004)

Motivated by competitive greed, a pioneer in robotics (Henriksen) assembles experts for an archaeological expedition in Antarctica. As the scientist had hoped, his team is the first to arrive. But the next team has come from outer space to kick ass, take names, and awaken the egg-producing Xenomorph queen. Violence ensues.
If you've been looking forward to this film in the hopes that it will be a major cinematic triumph, don't bother going to see it. Rent Alien and Predator and enjoy yourself at home. This movie is sleek, dark, and only distantly related to the films which spawned the titular characters. The problem here is that the man behind this film, unlike Ridley Scott, is a Brit who does not understand the unique American mindset behind these horror franchises. He seems to want to create something sterile, isolated, and claustrophobic. All of the carnal grit of the Predator films is gone, and all of the swarming, insectile menace of the Aliens has been boiled down to simple brooding and growling. What fights there are between the monsters are badly shot and badly lit. You can't tell who's hitting whom, who's growling, who's brooding; it's as if you're watching the fight while bouncing on a pogo stick and having a grand mal seizure. Anderson wants the creatures to be scary simply because they are on the screen. It doesn't work. There's nothing scary about this movie. The Predators are shot like big, lumbering brutes, while the Xenomorphs just look like robots. There really is some bad marionetting in this film. The dialog consists of vague declarative phrases: "Get out," "Run," "No, don't." There's not much for the characters to talk about in this film anyway; everything and everyone is set-dressing. The characters are vacuous and stupid. Even Lance, with his tiny part as a feeble old man, can't save the tepid script or galvanize the rest of the cast. The plot is rushed, its few key points barely trifled over. The movie ends with a nice little twist, but the audience is still left with questions like: How is she going to get out of Antarctica? And: Really? That's it? That said, I did enjoy this film. Yes I did. I didn't go in expecting an intellectual masterpiece. I wasn't hoping for scintillating dialog. I just wanted to see asses kicked and names taken. If you can lower your expectations to, say, Jurassic Park 3 level, you will find the grain of entertainment this film can provide. AVP gets 2 1/2 out of 5.