"You're one ugly mother..." movie.

Rating: 2/10 (13 February 2005)

Hollywood is not the most loved segment of the American population, and it's formulaic, "lets make a movie just to make money" movies like Alien vs. Predator that continues the dislike. There was no reason to combine two scientific franchises, independently popular, into this gross monstrosity of a convoluted plot of a money machine. Not since the Flintstones met the Jetsons has there been a weaker crossover than this. I'll give the movie some credit, they came up with the most reasonable reason for the aliens from the "Alien" movies to meet the aliens from "Predator" movies. We find that over the millions of years that the two "civilizations" have existed in this vast universe, the Predators have hunted the Aliens (I know they're all aliens, but I'll refer to them based on which movie that were in for my own benefit) on various planets. To save the planet from the aliens for sure, but mainly, I think the predators hunt the aliens for sport; it's like shooting fish in a barrel. There are loads of actors who I have never heard of before, and based on their performance, will never hear of them again. Paul W. S. Anderson is responsible for this movie, in more ways than he should legally be allowed, he directed it, wrote it, and produced it, as well as probably walked the movie to each multiplexed. At least that's the impression I got from the credits, which Anderson may now hold a record for most times mentioned in a single set of credits. The movie is sloppy, the effects look like computerized effects.... from 1985. And what mother would let their boy or girl go to Antarctica in the middle of winter without their hats and gloves? Come on, really? This wave of smashing popular movie franchises together appears to have no end in sight. With that in mind, here's a brief list of movies coming to a multiplex near you: Darth Vader vs. Hannibal Lecter, Daffy Duck vs. Donald Duck (we saw a preview of that classic duel in Who Framed Roger Rabbit?), Drego (Rocky IV) vs. Mr. T (Rocky III), and the one I can't wait for, Mary Poppins vs. Maria Von Trapp (The Sound of Music), where my money is on Julie Andrews. Hey, at least after Freddie vs. Jason and Alien vs. Predator, these movie match-ups can only be an improvement.