Questions for the filmmakers

Rating: Null/10 (31 August 2004)

Questions for the filmmakers... here goes.
1. Are you really trying to tell us that there were already aliens on Earth, and that predators were a major driving force for human civilization? And yet we had to travel into deep space to finally meet aliens? Mmm... unintentional irony.
2. Should a hieroglyphics expert, no matter how mysterious his accent, be able to decipher a convoluted alien ritual (written on a ceiling the size of the Sistene) faster that a Reader's Digest crossword? And without any reference of any kind? Even Indiana Jones needed his notebook.
3.Did you know that an Alien (warrior or Queen) would not attack a host carrying a live offspring, even to its own peril? That's because the offspring would die (hint: that's what the cocoons are for). So the Predator would not have been killed by the queen, nor had a live chestburster pop out at the end, once he was already dead.
4. Did you think we might not need to see this hapless bunch of goofs figure out step by step how the aliens work (when we in the audience have known for nearly 30 years), none of whom had any interesting talents that would plausibly lend to good action scenes. They didn't even appear to need the woman's mountaineering skills since it turned out, the Ps had conveniently shot a nice tunnel for them to slide down. What were all those characters there for, aside from being guinea pigs to show the audience (again) how the aliens infest, and the predators hunt?
5. Shouldn't the alien and the human lady have run away from the explosion holding hands?
6. Wouldn't holding a scooped-out alien head as a shield sort of... burn? And how could a small human lady (fit tho she may be) kill an alien in hand-to-hand? It ain't right.
7. Would Predators leave their only guns buried away for thousands of years?
That's a long time to be without your piece.
8. Weren't all those stone carvings of the As and Ps a little too obvious? I would have freaked out a bit when I saw them, nobody in the film did.
9. Why would Aztecs, Egyptians, and Cambodians have all decided to hang out and build pyramids in Antarctica? Wouldn't any of them have wanted to do this a little closer to home?
10. Did you see Cube? Be honest.
11. Did you see The Thing? Be honest.
12. Did you see Alien? Be honest.