Absolutely bloody terrible

Rating: 3/10 (21 May 2000)

This film has to be the worst of the series. Whereas Alien 4 would be hilarious if it wasn't so tragic, this is terrible in every way. Alien had only one, super-intelligent, creature. Aliens successfully altered the formula by having an army of gormless critters. This film has one alien, but unfortunately it's just as gormless. I won't give away plot points, but it does some stupid things. The characters are all bald in this film, making it more difficult to tell them apart. This fact, along with the fact that they are all rapists, murderers etc. does little to generate sympathy. The only character who we care about, played by Dance, is dropped from the story almost as soon as he appears. Finally, the overall tone of the film is VERY depressing and draining. Fincher (who should be shot for this film, however good Seven and Fight Club were) has tried to describe this film as upbeat. He must have some major emotional issues as you cannot describe a film in which 95% of the cast dies as upbeat.

**********PLOT SPOILERS BELOW!!!!****************
I can only think that this film was Fincher's deliberate attempt to murder a fantastic franchise. He kills Ripley, for a start, and in killing Hicks he destroys the possible replacement. I can see how the death of Hicks could have worked- going down in the blaze of glory against the aliens- but the helpless and ultimately pathetic death he suffers before the film even starts is wholly unacceptable. Killing Newt is just cruel.
I don't know what else to say about this travesty of a film. It has destroyed one of my favourite series of films. No wonder Alien 4 was so bad when it had to follow this crap.
I would give it 0/10 if I could, but I can't, so 1 it is.