3D Gimmick and Nothing More

Rating: 1/10 (13 March 2010)

This movie sucked!! The whole thing really hinges on being 3D and it's not worth it. You sit there and the previews start and it was more fun then the movie. Letters float and I remembered why I wanted to see a 3D movie because I like feeling like I need to move out of the way. But then the movie starts and the film feels like Tim Burton forgot it was 3D until someone said,"Well that was a terrible take just throw something at the audience and they won't notice." But I did So for those of you who have lived under a rock for the past 20 years you grew up watching the Alice in Wonderland animated movie if you didn't rent it at the local video store get those 3D glasses saved from Avatar and you will really enjoy it or go buy the book and throw it across the room. So you should know the story some girl goes down the rabbit hole then she meets these LSD influenced and you could care less about characters and that's it. But the problem comes when we all know the story! Yes it has the Hookah smoking Caterpillar, it has the Cat, and they seemed to have lost the Mad Hatter under Captain Jack Sparrow with a Scottish Accent. But why should you see this pop up book posing as a movie. You shouldn't haven't you read the beginning but if you wanted to here's the story. Alice is 19 and she is about to get married to a character created by Tim Burton on the set of Corpse Bride. His look and domineer is pulled almost spot on from one of the parents in that movie. Alice then sees the rabbit and fallows it down this hole and you know the rest. But the thing is Alice has been here before and the question is why the hell would you want to come back it's such a stupid story with characters created by Tim Burton with cool looks but look like they stepped out of some acid trip you had after reading the book. But they act more like characters for a radio drama. Every actor is flat, boring and almost regretting signing onto this movie and after they read the script and saw how terrible it was they put it into their performance. Maybe because I'm not 13 and think Nightmare Before Christmas was the greatest movie ever (and hint, hint Tim Burton did not Direct that TERRIBLE TERRIBLE MOVIE SO QUIT PRASING HIM FOR IT!!!) but Tim Burton acts like a film director but wants to be Robert Smith of The Cure he has the look down all he needs is to die and may be reincarnated as Robert Smith. The whole thing felt like it was half assed the only thing I felt looked good where some of the sets but the CGI was so bad it wasn't believable you could see that people didn't look the same because they where Green Screened in and it looks like it was cut and pasted from some picture you saw on the internet. So far 3D movies haven't sold me the whole thing felt like the main idea was the 3D the acting and the story and even the CGI which should be the most important if you want to put us in a real place. But it all feel behind because the 3D is what mattered most. And it only really hit me it was 3D after the fact someone through something at the screen. Overall it wasn't worth the $10 I spent. I could have spent that on the book then imagined the rest or I could have bought some LSD and had a better time sitting in my room listening to Led Zeppelin I could have done a whole lot more things with that $10. Maybe I should have paid someone to shoot me in the foot sure it would have hurt. But it would be worth it then having to see this boring plain and completely stupidly retarded movie. Freddy Got Fingered had my attention more than this.