And you thought Troy was bad...

Rating: 1/10 (4 December 2004)

After going through an experience like Alexander's three hours of ineptitude, a kind of mutual appreciation for surviving such rubbish. one does at least feel a kinship and bond with your fellow viewers. The most overwhelming emotion felt as the end credits run was like that of a trapped animal suddenly released into freedom. While Stone may seriously consider himself a dramatic historian with a gift for exploring avenues and angles on stories never considered, he is in fact more like a child who can't be bothered to read up on the subject and instead simply make the film he wants no matter what. Of course, this is all forgivable if the film were in any way entertaining or well acted. This is neither. It lurches lazily from one dire scene to the next like a badly rehearsed pantomime. Farrel is woefully miscast, Jolie's accent (one of the better ones!) is bizarre, and Tony Hopkins turns up for a quick earner at the beginning and end.
The most pathetic of all aspects though is the end. After all this dramatic recreation of possible events, Tony Hopkins character says something along the lines of "of course, this could all be a load of tummyrubbish". Oh nice one Tony, thanks!
If you thought Troy was bad (and you were right) then this will amaze you. It is in fact worse. From the Doors to Alexander. Stay away from history Oliver.