Alexander

Rating: 6/10 (22 January 2005)

Alexander: Directed by Oliver Stone, starring Colin Farrell, Angelina Jolie, Val Kilmer and Anthony Hopkins
*Possible spoilers*
Yet another big budget epic, this time on the life of Alexander the Great. The film starts off with a young Alexander who is nurtured and cared for by his mother who is played by Angelina Jolie (and has this really annoying accent that reminds me of some old Bond villains). Every now and then this is cut into by a narration by Anthony Hopkin's character who is a king, about some 40 years after Alexander's death, and is citing the story to have it written down. Anyway, she cares for Alexander a lot but isn't getting along with his father King Philip (Val Kilmer). There are glimpses here and there of Alexander growing up with him talking to his father about Achillies, being tutored by Aristotle and him meeting his horse. But as he gets older, his mother tells him that he must marry quickly and get a child because Philip has gotten a new wife who is already pregnant and if Alexander does not do it, his and his mothers family will be in danger of losing everything that they have got. Then one night during a big party, Alexander gets into an argument with his dad who banishes him from his kingdom. Then, through some confusing way that I didn't really get and this is again supposedly explained by Ptolemy (Hopkins) but you have to pay attention really hard if you want to know what happened. This is the films first big mistake in which Alexander's rise from being a nobody prince and being banished from his father's kingdom rises within the period of about 10 seconds to some great general who is commanding a 40,000 man army against the king of Persia. A great opportunity to show the real rise of Alexander was simply thrown away. Anyway, he keeps on going east but despite his victories, conflicts arise with his followers who want to go back to their homes and don't like how Alexander is being nice to the peoples he conquered. And that basically takes up the rest of the movie.
This movie is confused by itself. This is because the movie never really understands, what part of Alexander's life does it want to tell. It isn't really a war movie since there are only two two battles and even those are quite shabby. It isn't really a love movie because even though there is romance and phenomenally pathetic gay relationships, that still isn't what the movie is quite about. The closest it gets to being about one thing are the conflicts between Alexander and his generals. There is even some unintentional humor in this turkey with Alexander supposedly being the one who discovered and named monkeys as monkeys while on conquest of India and being the first one to suggest the building of a canal through Egypt. I seriously laughed when these things were mentioned. The movie never achieves a really epic feel that was masterfully created in LOTR. I was hoping for a movie about great conquests and battles but this was much smaller and more about one man.
The sets and the costumes were colorful and plentiful so it was a slight feast for the eyes. The CGI was OK and fortunately there wasn't too much of it. The cinematography was somewhat inconsistent. For the most part it was good with excellent aerials and shots of beautiful scenery but then really went down the drain in some parts of the battle scenes. As for the battle scenes themselves, they simply sucked. There were a couple of good scenes but for the most part the camera was shaking like it was an earthquake and the editing so mixed up that you seriously couldn't make out anything but swords clashing and blood flying. They simply weren't captivating enough and there were too many scenes where the soldiers were just standing there even though it was supposedly a very intense battle. The soundtrack (made by Vangelis) was pretty good but the way Stone used it simple made the movie so melodramatic that it really made me grab my head at how can they have created something like this. Some movies can do this with style but Alexander sure is not one of them.
I am not going to say that you should stay away but I recommend that you'd be better off watching something else instead