chaotic mess with only Jolie lead

Rating: 3/10 (6 January 2005)

SPOILERS In recent years there has been an increasing trend in Hollywood to produce major Epics about historical events. Every director has his own little time era or story which he likes to explore. After Wolfgang Peterson's adaptation of "Troy" last year, it is not hard to see why some began to question this devotion to the genre. Now, after Oliver Stone put considerable amounts of work into "Alexander", the genre must surely be all but buried. This film, led by an atrocious performance by Colin Farrell, is a chaotic mess which feels longer than the entire "Lord of the Rings" trilogy put together.
In ancient Macedonia, drunken King Philip (Val Kilmer) and his snake obsessed wife Olympias (Angelina Jolie) have a son, Alexander (Farrell). As Alexander slowly grows up, he and his friends learn about the known world, and develop as individuals. Eventually becoming King, Alexander will lead an army of Macedonians from one side of the known world to the other.
From the offset, questions must be raised about the creation of this film. With Anthony Hopkins as an old Ptolemy, we learn about the basics of the story, so as to lead us into Alexander's life. Hopkins will reoccur throughout the film, and unlike most of the cast, Hopkins is in trouble because he acts too well. Playing an old and feeble man, Hopkins looses cohesion and organised thought, countless times. So much so that if he was around in the modern day, he'd probably have been put in an old folks home years ago.
Once the story of Alexander himself actually begins to happen, events continue to progress at a crawl. From one encounter with his drunken father (Kilmer actually putting in a decent performance) to another, the boy grows up split between his parents. His mother is played by Angelina Jolie and to be completely honest, Jolie is perhaps the one highlight of the film. Looking as beautiful as ever, Jolie ranges from decent acting through to excessive over the top stages. Never the less, when she is on screen, she delights with her strange Transylvanian accent.
Parents aside, the problem for the young Alexander is the fact that he will eventually turn into Colin Farrell. Whilst normally a tolerable actor, in this film Farrell is absolutely hideous as the homosexual Alexander with an Irish accent. The accent is so strong in fact, that when young Alexander appears on the screen, you find yourself wetting yourself at how ridiculously Irish he is. Other actors suffer too as throughout the film, it appears that rather than simply giving Farrell voice lessons, it was easier to simply get huge numbers of the cast to speak as if they're from Dublin.
Crucially the main problem with "Alexander" is just how incoherent it is. From battle scenes which are impossible to follow, through to scenes of madness which are never fully resolved, the story suffers from bad direction and bad writing. Oliver Stone is normally wonderful at his job. With films like "Nixon", "Born on the Fourth of July" and "Natural Born Killers", Stone has proved that he can write, direct and produce films which hold together and entertain. it is amazing therefore that "Alexander", an amazing labour of love for Stone, is such an abomination.
When Farrell was first being touted as Alexander, there were actually two films about the figure being touted. With Stone making a film, fellow director Baz Luhrmann was also considering making the film, with Leonardo DiCaprio in the role of Alexander. Whether this other film will ever be made now is unknown, but hope springs eternal. Whilst few could compare to Jolie's performance (Nicole Kidman originally being touted), in the hands of Luhrmann and DiCaprio, the story and lead character could be significantly better than the turgid mess which is now available. "Alexander" was being put forward as something special. Well in that respect it is true. The film is certainly special, but not in a good way. Avoid.