Aladdin 2019: The Most Expensive High School Play of All Time

Rating: Null/10 (21 August 2019)

1992's Aladdin is one of the best movies in Disney's extensive catalog. Beautiful visuals, great music, stellar comedy, and Iago the parrot. It's left a major impact on the Disney movie formula with touches of its comedic style felt in subsequent Disney films like The Lion King, Emperor's New Groove, Hunchback of Notre Dame, and Big Hero 6 (even if that's not always a positive trait). At the time of its release, it was hot off the heels of Beauty and the Beast and at the height of the Disney Renaissance. It was wildly successful in theaters and years afterward through syndication, making it one of the most beloved of Disney's films. Most, if not all, the hype surrounding the movie then and now was focused on one thing in particular.
The golden ticket that Aladdin owes most of its lasting success to (besides maybe the music) is the late actor/comedian Robin Williams and his portrayal of the Genie. His quick-talking, pop culture referencing, and shapeshifting antics completely override the movie's tone the moment he's introduced. He's the main template from which most other animated comic relief characters are derived. The folks over at Disney knew they had gold on their hands even at the time as Genie was the focus of most of the marketing for the movie.. Even though Robin has had dozens of memorable roles over his career up to his death, none rival the popularity and belovedness of the Genie.
So imagine the internet's reaction when Disney releases a trailer of their live action Aladdin remake where the Genie looks like a SnapChat filter. Understand that I'm not gonna bash the live-action Aladdin for things like "the Genie/music/blablablah is too different to the original." Being different isn't the problem with this movie, quite the opposite. The problem is being derivative and pointless.
The most talked about aspect of the movie is the performances and we're already off to a weak start. As two positives, Naomi Scott as Jasmine was good and Will Smith as the Genie was alright. There's not much to say of Naomi other than she did a really good job portraying Jasmine. It helped that the dialogue for her wasn't god awful, but I still think her acting skills went into Jasmine being the only part of this movie I really liked. The Genie is a bit more interesting. Most of the returning characters from the original are more or less the same in terms of their core archetype. The Genie was wildly changed due to the fact that Will Smith could never hope to recreate Robin Williams's performance. So instead, the Genie is a snarky sass-machine. His comedy isn't focused on fast-talking impersonations and shape shifting but more so poking fun at Aladdin and the situations they find themselves in. In the scene after the "Prince Ali" song, Aladdin is miserably failing at impressing the Sultan and his court. He goes on a tangent about jams and Genie quietly tells Aladdin to knock it off with the jam and says how uncomfortable he was after the fact. I'd recommend you look up the scene yourself to help gauge whether or not Genie's comedy is for you. The only other changes are that the Sultan went from a bumbling buffoon to a generic serious guy and that Jafar has an impoverished background as a thief (which isn't really explored).
Speaking of which, everybody else in this movie is either forgettable (like the Sultan of Aladdin himself) or outright laughably bad. One of those laughable characters is a new one, Jasmine's handmaiden Dalia. Some of her moments had me laughing in the theater at how unfunny or awkward they were. However, I would be willing to put most of that on the fact that Dalia's actress, Nasim Pedrad, was given nothing to work with. She has the least to do or say out of any "important" character in this movie so I can't say the actress is fully to blame. But Dalia pales in comparison to the real so-bad-it's-good character, Jafar. Not only does he have way less character in terms of his dialogue, his actor seems to refuse to emote or give any flair to his material. He also has a tendency to really over exaggerate his mouth when speaking, kinda like those videos where the Team Fortress 2 trailer models are given 400% facial animations. Jafar's actor, Marwan Kenzari, is Dutch so he might just have to do that because English isn't his native language. I'm not trying to make fun of him, I'm just pointing out the one bit of personality in a performance where there otherwise would be none.
Much like the acting, both the music and the visuals are a mixed bag. Let's do visuals first. Most of the animals looked fine, nothing special, they'll look dated in the next three years. Genie looked bad in the beginning but got better as time went on. Most of the CG environmental stuff during songs like "A Whole New World" and 'Friend Like Me" were well done. But, my god, when Jafar turns into a genie at the end, it's so bad it's hilarious.Most of the practical stuff ranges from okay to bad, too. The costumes were really good. The sets were hit or miss. A lot of the extras felt stiff at the most unnatural points. During the Prince Ali and party scenes, the crowd feel like high school play extras that don't want to be there. Another thing that bothers me is how clean everyone looks all the time. Despite being in the desert, none of them ever have any sand or dirt on them and that doesn't sit right with me. Shot composition is also pretty flat, with little style or personality. The only time you get anything is when the film goes into slow motion for no real reason but to raise the tension maybe? Either way, not much to talk about.
Music is the only semi-consistent aspect of the film. Almost all of the music is on par with the original, even the new song they added in. The exceptions are Genie's two songs, "Friend Like Me" and "Prince Ali." The instrumentals are well done and professional, but Will Smith can't sing. Neither could Robin, but he made up for that with the personality and goofiness with which he sang the lyrics. Will Smith sings flatly and they just gave him Auto-Tune in post.
With the poor acting, stiff extras, flat cinematography, and the artificially clean look of the people and costumes, this movie gave me the vibe of a high school stage play with some subpar CGI and put on film. For a film made by the most powerful entertainment company in the world, the film feels ameteur in almost all aspects besides the music. This speaks to a general problem with Disney remakes as of late. They try to recapture the magic of a film when that's impossible and goes against what remakes should be for. The nitty gritty of the subject is beyond the scope of a review of a cash grab, but think of it in this simplified way: Remakes are good when they rework bad or dated movies or take concepts of good movies and go into a new direction with them. The Aladdin remake doesn't fit into either one of these categories and it shows. If the cinematography were great, the dialogue and actors were less awkward, the CGI was less creepy in places, and Will Smith could sing, maybe I wouldn't mind them treading old ground as much (though I'd still dislike it). However, if all those things were quality, it wouldn't really be your average Disney live-action remake, now would it?