Abraham Lincoln's Forty Whacks

Rating: 10/10 (17 October 2012)

Benjamin Walker is Abe Lincoln in this, what should be rather silly Movie. The title and concept was so outrageous I had to see it. I was surprised to see how well they merged the "vampire" story in with what we know about the historical man.
As a boy Abe sees "Jack Barts" (Marton Czokas) beating on his colored friend Will Johnson. He attacks, causing Barts to take revenge on his mother. This begins a mission of vengeance that has to be put on hold due to a promise to his father (Joseph Mawle) - After whose death he is freed of the obligation to not do anything crazy, he immediately finds his fortification of liquid courage and goes after Barts - and therefore finds himself in a World of Hurt. Rescued by "Henry Sturges" (Dominic Cooper), he is trained how to use his weapon of choice, a silver-plated Axe, to do away with Vampires.
So Sturges sends him packing to Illinois, with a list of names to deal with. But Barts has not forgotten that Lincoln had shot out his eye. And is stalking him as he courts Mary Todd (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), leading to a final battle between Barts and Lincoln: Who reveals an unpleasant truth to Abe before Abe removes an unsightly head - Sturges is a vampire as well!
The way this is played out, is not verbal, but visual. Sturges tells his story to Abe in a vignette showing how "Adam" - That father of all vampires - Had converted him using his own wife's (Teri Wyble) blood. And a new twist is added to the ages old mythology of vampires - They cannot harm each other. Ergo, Sturges through the years has been training Slayers to kill those who did this to him, and Lincoln is just the latest one.
Lincoln marries Mary Todd and tells Sturges he is unconcerned, Adam of course does not know who he is. But unfortunately Barts had Lincoln's pocket watch in his gripping hand as he was killed, and Adam finds the watch in Bart's Coffin. And so Adam invites Abe to a "ball" using his childhood friend Will Johnson (Anthony Mackie) as "bait." Lincoln then tells his employer Joshua "Speed" (Jimmi Simpson) the whole sordid story and brings him in to help. So Abe confronts Adam (Rufus Sewell) - Who has him at a disadvantage, trapping him. Adam tells Abe his long history using some interesting animation, and gives Abe a choice: Kill Sturges, or be made into a vampire using Will's blood. But Joshua has a "calvary to the rescue" moment and rides his stagecoach into Adam's house... And as they escape, they meet another historical figure: Harriet Tubman of the "Underground Railroad" - This is the first time "Lincoln's Train" is brought up.
It is after these events, Lincoln puts away his Axe and is more or less his historical self. He is seen arguing with Stephen A. Douglas (a cameo by Alan Tudyk) at the beginning of his political career. As Sturges had put it: "Always have a contingency plan" and we see this referred to several times in this film. In this case, Abe had developed a career in Politics, and for a time sets down the Axe.
But the heat rises when he becomes President: The institution of Slavery had been used to feed a growing population of Vampires in the South, with their needs being sated that way, they stayed put. But now, Slavery is Abolished, and the vampires take an active role in the Civil War on the side of The South: And there are a few scenes of Civil War reenactments that are wonderfully done, especially one classic scene where a particular Northern Captain is the only one left standing after the Vampire Southern Soldiers sweep away all of his men.
The vampires take personal revenge on Abe Lincoln, and Mary Todd is on the verge of being driven mad. But with the loss of his son, Lincoln is shown the solution: With one and only one chance of beating them. So he loads a train full of this "solution" - Only to be betrayed by Joshua Speed.
But Honest Abe has some tricks of his own, and he finally pulls the old Axe out of mothballs, not as limber as he was when he was younger, but he soon finds his moves. So it becomes a race to Gettysberg - Can Abe get there first, or will his train get derailed?
But Abraham Lincoln has more than one Train...