This was NOT a good movie

Rating: 5/10 (8 May 2018)

I've heard the people involved in this film say "it's not about the monsters, it's about the family" Whatever. A lazy deflection to excuse the writers and director from taking responsibilities for wide gaping crater holes in the script and scenarios that ignore common sense. You see plot holes and lack of common sense are totally common in the horror genre... which is exactly why this movie does NOTHING new for the genre. Let me at least compliment the acting... it was indeed solid. Emily Blunt always delivers... somebody trade her to Cavs so Lebron can get some water. The actress that plays her daughter, Millicent something...(im sure ill be learning her name very soon) was fantastic. Actually both the child actors were fantastic.
Now here's my problem... I'm not one of those annoying nitpicks that gripe about every single detail. But don't ask me to suspend my disbelief for two hours if you're going to ignore the basic laws of common sense. Exhibit A: Why the F was a 4 year old kid LEFT SEVERAL FEET BEHIND THE FAMILY ALONE DURING THE APOCALYPSE?!?!? Exhibit B: Someone...please someone explain to me why?!?!? during the F'ing apocalypse this husband and wife duo couldn't grab some condoms while they grabbed meds at the pharmacy?!? Are you forreal?! You think this is a good time to expand the family? Exhibit C: Maybe this can be debated... the fastest birth ever on earth!!!!! She legit pooped that kid out. Exhibit D: Monster bursts out of the steel container like its freakin paper...can't break the windows or metal of a rusty old truck 5 minutes later?
Listen A+ for creating tension in a fresh way. Having most of the movie be the actions of characters instead of their words in definitely powerful and is also the best way to evaluate good or crappy acting. If i can watch something with the volume off and it still affects me... then those actors did a damned good job. And I get it... for all the people in the theater there was probably only one other person that wasnt so distracted by the music and jump scares to ignore the wide open holes and cliche idiot decisions. Sorry folks... this was not the gamechanger everyone would have you believe it was. Looking forward to Hereditary...