Life as a comic book king...

Rating: 9/10 (11 April 2007)

When you see a Warner Brothers film, 99% of the time, you know how you feel about the film within about 20 seconds. Warner Brothers just about always change the logo's colour design depending on the film. 20 seconds into 300, I was ecstatic. The logo, in front of the dirty, cloudy sky looked beautiful. 20 seconds later, an old man stands holding a baby. He looks like the kind of guy who should be playing Moses. A gravely (yet distinct) voice begins talking about Spartan rituals. Basically, you have to be a really hard bastard from the point you're born. Or you're thrown from a cliff. As a baby.
Suddenly, the camera drops about 30 feet and you see the ground below the cliff is littered with skulls. Very small skulls. This really is a film that isn't afraid to cause controversy. From this point in, we follow the growing up of future King of Sparta, Leonidas. Not once does the film drop its pace. Whether beating the living shite out of another warrior trainee or fighting a wolf, this film knows how to keep you on the edge.
Just when you think the film really can't get much cooler, it starts introducing characters that will not only stay with you until the end of the film, but as long as you remain a lover of ultra-violence. Other than King Leonidas, you have Queen Gorgol, his wife. Very wise and happens to be the only speaking female character within the film. Dilios; the narrator is very passionate about fighting. Other than narrating, he does very little for the first half of the film but has a crucial role towards the end. Ephialtes; This deformed Spartan outcast is a hunchback and an example of what inspires 'beautiful disgust' which I'll come onto in a moment. King Xerxes; In short, he's the baddie but he considers himself to be more of a deity than a king and tries to use his powers to tempt people.
Throughout the film, just about all the background is CG'd in. I'm not a massive fan of CG but like Sin City, 300 makes perfect use of it. The backgrounds are never anything short of astounding and throughout, I found myself wondering whether I should admire the action or the background. Similarly, because the film plays about with mythology a lot, there are some great horrendous beasts in 300. But unlike films such as Harry Potter or Pirates of the Caribbean 2, 300 manages to create these great horrific creatures, but still make them seem absolutely beautiful to watch. There is not a moment in this film that is dull or ugly. Everything looks perfect.
Finally...the fighting. What can one say? It's a huge let down... ... Just kidding. The violence in this is absolutely spectacular. Remember thinking Kill Bill was crazy? Then this is the film for you! The action is immense. Perfectly rehearsed and choreographed violence, mixed with great acting to make it seem as if it's unexpected make the action scenes in this film some of the best ever! The editing takes a very unorthodox style that works uniquely. As King Leonidas runs through battle the action has been slowed down to basically make everything seem really cool. Then suddenly, as an opponent comes into view, the action speeds up really fast. Rather than draw back, slice, blood splatter, carry on running...it's all a case of running, death, running, death, running, death. A 45 second steadicam shot following a soldier suddenly becomes a 3 minute blend of hyper violence and gore. Throughout this film, very little real fake blood was used. It's mostly all CG'd in. It creates an effect similar to that in Sin City: the blood is obviously fake but looks remarkably pretty. In comparison to the obese amount of death, the amount of CG'd blood is just about right. The editors weren't generous. Nobody said "This will be the goriest film ever". They made it the most violent, but not the goriest. And for that reason, it seems 300 stands above other films that seem to attract teen audiences because of the obscene amounts of violence. 300 retains it's dignity, because it has no problem mixing fact with fiction, mixing depth with stupidity, and mixing fun with utter drama.
...
Screw it, if you're reading this review, you don't really care about any of this. If you want to see sex, violence and humour, check it out!