Hogwash.

Rating: 1/10 (29 June 2007)

Big bang special effects, black lighting blue and green screens, buffed up actors, no style as far as widescreen is concerned, no good at making an impression on anyone but numb skulled audience members (of which there are obviously many of) to a certain degree. Shall I keep on going? Supposedly based on true events, fictionalized for novel purpose, and blown over the top and out the old proverbial dumper for theaters, this film was a D.O.A. from the second the company logo played. It has all the intensity of a dog taking a bowel movement. Halfway through the film I was sitting in the theater asking myself, 'just what exactly is this about again?' and then it hit me how horrendous the filmmakers visions were.
It was just that which made this film so bad, clashing visions. And you can see it in the trailers and promotional material for this film. On one hand, you have actors working out their damned hardest to get into lean shape, and make their characters stand out, but of course falling into the age old Hollywood Blockbuster curse, they are eclipsed by the way they look and no one even cares about where they have been or where they are going. There is no depth, there is only look, and looks. Poor actors, such as Gerard Butler, Dominic West, and David Wenham, giving it their all, and for what? So people can take a look at their chests, muscles, and rear ends. They give the film nothing more. No spunk, no attitude. Nothing. And that's just the start. All the special effects that it took to make the film also fall futile. There is really nothing impressive about the ultra super imposed grainy look given to battle sequences, the MTV fast-slow quick camera movement that has become cliché in the last few years of bad movies, and the horrible use of music throughout the film. All it does is show that too many people had one too many hands in this film, that they all crashed and this film burned because of it. What I'm getting at is that this film is a poor man's 'Gladiator' with sped up camera changes, blaring guitar music that is supposed to 'elevate' the tension of the fight scenes (it doesn't) and actors supposed to look mighty and tough, but only look like homo-erotic male strippers. All this drawn together, too much 'creativity'(if that's what one would call it, I wouldn't though) strung together on God knows what, and mashed into a digital garbage can, this is what you get.
There is nothing about 300 that is remotely moving. It has the depth of a bathtub, the feel of sand paper, the sound of grinding in your ears, the look of a comic book that was left outside in the rain for a few years, run over by a tow truck carrying the film crew to the studio to work on another film to redeem themselves from making this piece of stench, and then left on the shelf, you get the point.
I could go on, but why bother? If you haven't gotten the point by now, you won't. Watch it at your own risk, and try not to use(loose) too many brain cells.
This film is Hogwash.