30 Days of Boredom

Rating: 1/10 (20 October 2007)

30 Days of Night (2007)
Review: Now the new genre is on graphic novels. Here is another one.
30 Days of Night is one kind of movie. This is a attempt at suspense horror, but fails on a lot of levels. Josh Hartnett plays the local sheriff of a small Alaskan town that winds up arresting a local stranger for a disturbance and locks him up. This stranger is just that, a total nobody that gives the rest of the crew the creeps about "them".
Enter a bunch of no name characters with almost no development and the very pretty ex-girlfriend and that's our cast. Then the vampires show up and kill. They start by killing helpless dogs just because of the barking. I am a dog person, so I hate it when dogs are killed. This still did not make much sense.
Enter the vampires. These have to be the most least frightening vampires since "Blade:Trinity". Their mouths morph in need of a bite and most look like a bunch of Emo-goth rejects with the utterly lame head vampire. They also speak in a native tongue not English. That really bothers me. It was irritating as hell.
At least there was something cool here. Great character actor Mark Boone Junior is here and has the best scenes in the movie by using a snowplow and a tractor to slay some vampires. These scenes are far too short, but well done.
30 Days of Night suffers from many plot holes. How did the people know exactly what day is it? Why did the vampires have the stranger creep out the local folk? Could they just invade without warning instead? How is it that being without a shower for so long can they still look good? Wow, for being without a bath for so long, her platinum blond hair is quite stunning.
Josh Hartnett needs that one and only vehicle to launch his career into orbit, but this is not the way to start it. Nice try kid. Better luck next time.
The Last Word: Quite bad. At least I saw a trailer for Beowolf, so it wasn't a total loss.