Zombies = 10 rating

Rating: 1/10 (16 December 2007)

For a start. Then we begin dinging.
Ding 1 for the casting. Aren't we sick of RADA brats yet? How does such a pathetic passive wimp get to be a Major? How come most of the "Yanks" sound like they're doing bad pastiches?
Ding another for plagiarism.The helicopter harvest scene isn't a homage to Romero: it's lifted straight from World War Z.
Another ding for editing, which is egregiously jumpy. That's pragmatically excusable to save budget, but this film shouldn't have needed it. It could have done with less CGI, and more choreography.
And finally we ding 2,562,724 for stupidity, which kicks in as soon as the location moves to London, and never quits. There's too much to list, but the standouts include the tedious guided tour of London landmarks, the "securing" of people in a bunker with a back door, the curious ineffectiveness of automatic weapons against massed charges (funny, it worked in World War I), the unbelievable deliberate Blue on Blue fire, the "I can see, so you go first" subway scenes, the infuriatingly clumsy military banter, and in the helicopter rip-off scene, they apparently plain forgot that they weren't making a Romero slow-headshot-zombies film!
It's simply sloppy writing, scene after scene after scene, and I find it intolerable in comparison with 28 Days Later, which only required a suspension of disbelief in the premise. 28 Weeks Later seems to cry out "Yeah, we know this is dumb, but wait until you see the next pyro-CGI-gasm!"
So, that's a total score of -2562717, rounded up to the minimum that IMDb will let me vote.