28 "hellos" too many

Rating: Null/10 (21 May 2004)

Wow! I saw the movie poster and it had a zombie statement. I was wayyy excited. A new Zombie movie, sweeeeet!!! Well, it came out and there was all these reviews of people saying they peed their pants it scared them so bad. So I ran to see it (insert uncomfortable silence here). Don't get me wrong, it had some nice gore and a few creatures that were like zombies, but what the hell is up with the long drawn out boring-ass dialogue scenes in European movies? Don't they know that us Americans have the answer with gore, loud music, sex, and nonstop action? The thing that got me the most was, didn't monkey-boy (well, he did look like a monkey with that full facial beard) get a clue that yelling "hello?" in a room full of resting zombies didn't work when they almost got him in the church? Next time he's in a room full of dead, what's he do? That right, yells, "hello?" And he kept doing it through the whole movie. He was about the only one who deserved to die and managed not to. Oh well, it did give me a chance to get drunk by drinking a beer every time he said hello. I tried to count how many times he did, but got to drunk. I'll stick with the real zombie movies, like Dawn of the Dead.