If you like projectile blood vomiting, and rape

Rating: 4/10 (1 November 2005)

I got this movie to watch on Halloween because it was reputedly a very scary movie. I don't think I felt frightened even once in the entire movie. There is no aching suspense, no sudden jumping out.
The lead actor Cillian Murphy is almost impossibly handsome. The camera often takes time out from the mountains of gore to lovingly caress his face and body which sometimes seems so jarringly immaculate it looks as if he just walked off a fashion runway.
There is lots of slime and blood and festering, hours of it. There is also what felt like like 10 hours of footage of people bashing each others' brains out in the dark. I could not tell who was bashing who or why.
I have never watched a movie where I had less sympathy for any of the characters. Even the "heroes" were totally selfish opportunists.
The rape scenes were supposed to be terrifying, but I could not help but laugh. Why would anyone give a thought to rape when they knew they were about be pounced on at any second by rabid plague victims? The mayhem wore thin very quickly. The villains were as distinctive as the white plastic-coated soldiers in Star Wars.
By far the most interesting parts of the movie were about the gritty practicalities of living without electricity, running water, grocery stores or other people.
As metaphor, the movie had its moments. It showed how money really is just a token in a social game. Money becomes meaningless in the apocalyptic world. There was one bit of philosophising when a soldier noted that for most of earth's history it had no people, and now with this megaplague, earth was returning to normal. The plague itself is symbolic of the rage that spreads from person to person in modern urban society, erupting in mass violence like the Iraq war.
The special effects went on for what seemed like an eternity too, namely wandering through British cities without seeing a even a single car or pedestrian. I suppose these might be more interesting to people familiar with the landmarks with their normal bustle. The effect was supposed to be eerie, but for me, it came across much like visiting a resort town out of tourist season. It has been done too many times before and director Danny Boyle belaboured it. He went on for what felt like hours of it with nothing happening.
P.S. I was not on drugs. The time dilation effect comes purely through repetition of the exact same thing over and over and over.