Trust Danny Boyle to get confused even by something as simple and straight-forward as the zombie sub-genre...

Rating: Null/10 (16 May 2009)

28DL starts off much like "The Quiet Earth" and "The World The Flesh & The Devil", soon switching into "The Dawn of the Dead" mode, only to totally disappoint by going into retarded "Day of the Dead" territory. The bad bad evil evil military (all 8 of them) turn out to be a bigger threat than the zombies themselves - an idiotic premise already served to us 20 years earlier by the perpetually un-intellectual drivel-making liberal nincompoop, George Romero.
I've said this before and I'll say it again (and again): whoever (mis)uses the zombie genre to make "clever" political commentary needs to have their head examined. There is a time and place for everything, hence screaming, brainless, undead morons (am referring to the zombies, not Hollywood's horror directors) do not a proper background for social satire make.
The problem with the third part of the movie (the army part) is that zombies are completely pushed aside. Boyle, in his infinite and typical lack of wisdom, switches off the by-then seemingly limitless supply of zombies, turning 28DL into a mere cheap exploitation thriller with effeminate post-apocalyptic Cillian saving damsels in distress from an almost certain destiny of getting raped by a bunch of horny soldiers. I sort of half-assumed they'd rape Cillian first, what with his unusually high estrogen levels. Let's face it, even those two girls look less female than he does. When will this current trend of casting hermaphroditic "males" as screen heroes finally end? How many more Di Caprios does the movie world need? Who has stolen all of the testosterone from the modern male?
Thrillers are by far the dumbest genre: far-fetched plots, plenty of illogicality, poor and often contradictory character development, etc... The worst aspect of Boyle's version of "Day of the Dead" was Bambi-like Cillian becoming Rambo - killing off the scared, incompetent little soldiers as if they were a bunch of kids and amateurs. Remember: Cillian started off as a skinny nerd, recovering from both the injuries that brought him to the hospital in the first place, and the disorientation caused by the world he found after he woke up. Plus, also remember: these soldiers were not only trained for combat, but they belonged to a small number who actually managed to survive the virus. So obviously musculary-challenged, X-legged Cillian bumps them all off as if they were mere flies in his soup...
Baby-faced Cillian strips off his shirt like a WWF wrestler and proceeds to stalk, kill and destroy enemy targets like a computer-game soldier in heat. That was the point at which I had to start laughing. I always appreciate a good comedy, but something tells me that Boyle's tiny mind had different intentions...
Apparently, it doesn't take (British) soldiers long (several weeks?) to become stark raving sex maniacs, hell-bent on killing off males and screwing females. Boyle's understanding of human psychology is catastrophic - mildly put. But what else can one expect from a director who in all honesty and wide-eyed naive enthusiasm promoted "Sunshine" as a serious sci-fi film? Boyle can barely handle i.e. understand zombie psychology, let alone human.
Politically correct - hence stupid - ending with the two females being the sole survivors. Who would have "thunk" it?! So predictable...
What's with that post-end-credits final twist? Was Boyle trying to start a new trend? "Watch the WHOLE movie, if you wanna see the REAL ending". What a boyle on my movie bum Danny's turned out to be post-"Trainspotting"...
I love the way the girl's father gets killed: that drop of blood falling from a dried up zombie should get an Oscar. An Oscar for Silliest Horror Film Scene Of The Year.
Boyle still seems to be confused about movie genres, particularly horror and comedy.