An insult to IMDb for this to be rated any higher than 7

Rating: 2/10 (30 June 2014)

I mean seriously. This used to be a respected site that gave people who didn't know much films insight into the greatest films and audience ratings for every film they've ever watched. 8.0. Dammit IMDb users.
This film is categorized as comedy, so I pessimistically expected a few laughs. I got 4. Two were for slapstick comedy, one was at Ice Cube's death stare, and the final laugh I had was at the end credits (Not because they were funny, but because the entire audience was utterly silent at the forced humour). I wasn't alone, in the theatre it was mostly silent, as we googled the bloody IMDb page to check if it was a comedy. Small British audience I'll give you that, and pretty strange considering how 'everyone' (Americans) laughed their ass of at this movie. The opening sequence chase had me in awe of how bad it was.
Before you type an angry reply saying "You just don't get the humour" or "It doesn't suit everybody". I understand. This is just my view, it may not be right, I may get proved wrong, but here is my case and the overwhelming evidence to prove why. The repetitive cinematography, the forced homoerotic jokes (as if the movie sends out a strong message on the subject), the pop-culture based soundtrack choices and the 'making fun of ourselves' tries so hard to be clever it ruins the movie. Although these factors ruin the movie like a crooked candle ruins a pound-land birthday cake.
I feel like I can envisage Jonah Hill and Michael Bacall (One of the screenplay writers) sitting down and saying stupid ideas and Jonah going "Hah! That would be so funny!" after every one. I like Jonah, he is a good actor, and Channing is trying so hard to impress I can't fault him for what his character is tasked to do.
But here it comes, the problem that made me cringe, the audience look at each other and say "Oh god", the one person in my theatre walk out (probably the reason), The Dialogue.
Oh my goodness. How did this film make it past the producing companies with this damn dialogue. The film tries to make itself clever, it does little references that try and make it a film that is funny, but still smart. Like that budget gag, or the "Gringo Pendejos". The prodigious awkwardness between Jonah (I'm not going to say the character names due to the fact I lost 8 quid on this movie) and the bland bland bland spouse of his (we get it, Jonah's character isn't as good with girls as Channing, but due to his doughy lovable personality, he gets the girl! Wow!), had me contemplating walking out. The other girl, Jillain Bell brought a lot more, but not enough to make any noticeable difference. Channing Tatum's 'bro' language with his 'buddy', was just horrific. It was a train wreck. Something I imagine Americans found funny. Like the whole "American college is a non-stop drug fuelled orgy" theme that it embraced shamelessly. Oh, and the token drug trip that had such potential, but it was just terrific...ly painful to watch.
This movie says in full view, "It's the same as before! Oh wait, it isn't! Hah!", and I wouldn't mind. That's right. I would not care. It's another film of the Project X genre, of America high-fiving itself. But it's just another right? Well that's what I thought, but then I see so many people saying how damn amazing it is, I saw a thread (highly sophisticated reviewing and analysing may I add) that went like this,
"They (*Probably the two main characters who are liked so much people can't see them do wrong) were awesome! *spoiler* when I saw seth rogen I DIED! and when Jonah Hill was acting like nothing changed! lol! "
Seeing Seth Rogen isn't funny. I like his movies, but he didn't do anything funny. It's immature humour that is carelessly littered and licked up by Americans (sorry for repeating myself, but who else could like this so much to give it an 8.0?)
If someone thinks differently, please give me your best shot. Because it is an insult to rate this film so highly if I am really seeing it as it is. Did I miss the humour? Was Jonah Hill doing a Mexican accent funny? Was Channing Tatum dancing to a song of "ass and titties" funny? It wasn't. I see why it appeals to a certain 'type' of audience member, but I thought that's why IMDb is here? To direct us away from these peoples opinions.
Enlighten me, because my oh my am I reviewing using IMDb at all if this piece of garbage is rated 0.3 off '2001 A Space Odyssey". Some people will find this funny, some will not, but I hope I have persuaded you that it is not a great film.